Dr Wilson in Houston?

[Spiky Bugger]

I posted this on the FB page, and reposting here. If I weren't a widow and didn't have responsibilities to multiple people and had functional family within a day's drive it would be one thing. But I don't. And, being honest, I'm getting tired of being told that I'm going to ruin my life if I don't make a trip that I can't manage and I'm about ready to just give up on asking anyone for help that works because obviously my personal circumstances are less important than browbeating me over my options.

I'm doing the best I can with what I can and within the parameters that work for my life.

We all have personal circumstances. Some of us think we are more special or more burdened than others. We probably are not.

I think the point that SO MANY VETS are trying to make is that whatever your special needs are at the moment, the chances that a botched revision is going to increase those problems EXPONENTIALLY decrease with the more experienced surgeons.


You may do well. Or...you can go to OH and find someone named Larissa who decided that her financial problems trumped the "keep away from him" advice she got...and read how butchered she was.

And really...a GREAT surgeon doesn't come with guarantees...just better odds.


Edited to add...chances are very good that, in the week or several weeks (YMMV) post-op, you will be of ZERO use to the family who depends on you, whether you are down the street or on another continent. This is MONUMENTALLY different than LapBand surgery or even more extensive surgeries I have had...and my band was no problem to remove.

 

[DianaCox]

People who are depressed and believe themselves to be oppressed (read your description of your circumstances) underestimate their capacity to adapt, be flexible, and find the help they need to do the best thing for themselves. We are trying to help you see alternatives and options you can't seem to see for yourself - but you choose to see it as browbeating. Whatever.

If you keep doing the same thing as you've always done, you are going to get the same results you always have. You're going to have to change your attitude before you can change your mind. People are trying to help you do better for yourself, but you are rejecting help in favor of repeating your mantra of "I can't" and getting angry at the real help you are being given, which is guidance to open your mind to possibilities you don't seem to appreciate.

Ultimately, nobody here really cares what you choose. We don't get toasters, kickbacks, or any remuneration for trying to help pre-ops find the best surgeon, the safest options, or any such benefit from spending our time trying to help you. So long as you know that you HAVE options, we don't give a rat's ass whether you take them. We do, however, get the satisfaction of Paying it Forward in gratitude for those who did it for us, as well as knowing that even if the person we are speaking to specifically (in this case, you), doesn't appreciate what we are doing, other newbies will learn from our posts and your mistakes.

So you can put on your Big Girl Panties and realize that we have taken the time to make sure that you know that you have options, or you can whine about how we are being MEAN to you by telling you that you have them, thus making you feel badly about taking the easy way out in the short run, while risking sacrificing your health and well-being in the long run. Think about how STOOPID that is. And then feel free to take our advice or blow us off - either way, WE DON'T REALLY CARE. Our "job" - to make sure you KNOW you have options, and the potential ramifications of choosing the wrong one - is done.

 

[Larra]

Bywater, hang in there! It sounds like your responsibilities are overwhelming. As Rob said, we are all in this together. I often tell people that logistics are just logistics, but sometimes the issues that prevent someone from taking what might seem doable to outsiders really isn't. I would love for you to be able to go to Dr. Ayoola in Denton, but if you, knowing the realities of your life and the resources available to you, tell me that it just can't be done at present, I believe you.
Having said that, it's still worth the effort to find the best possible DS surgeon closer to home. My gut feeling is that this will turn out to be Dr. Wilson, but the reality is that I'm in CA and have no personal experience with any surgeon in TX. I think Rob's consult this week will give both of you a lot more information about Dr. Wilson, and I'm hopeful that he'll work out for both of you.
One last thought - unless I miss my guess, you spend most of your time caring for others, and putting their welfare ahead of your own. This is one of those times when you will need to put your own welfare first, and that's not a selfish thing to do. We are all entitled to put ourselves first sometimes, and this is one of those times. So just be open to all the possibilities available to you, and tell yourself yes even if others are telling you no. You are allowed to do that!

 

[Spiky Bugger]

Bywater, hang in there! It sounds like your responsibilities are overwhelming. As Rob said, we are all in this together. I often tell people that logistics are just logistics, but sometimes the issues that prevent someone from taking what might seem doable to outsiders really isn't. I would love for you to be able to go to Dr. Ayoola in Denton, but if you, knowing the realities of your life and the resources available to you, tell me that it just can't be done at present, I believe you.
Having said that, it's still worth the effort to find the best possible DS surgeon closer to home. My gut feeling is that this will turn out to be Dr. Wilson, but the reality is that I'm in CA and have no personal experience with any surgeon in TX. I think Rob's consult this week will give both of you a lot more information about Dr. Wilson, and I'm hopeful that he'll work out for both of you.
One last thought - unless I miss my guess, you spend most of your time caring for others, and putting their welfare ahead of your own. This is one of those times when you will need to put your own welfare first, and that's not a selfish thing to do. We are all entitled to put ourselves first sometimes, and this is one of those times. So just be open to all the possibilities available to you, and tell yourself yes even if others are telling you no. You are allowed to do that!

So genteel.

As usual.

 

[DianaCox]

One more thing, to the OP and to anyone reading this thread:

When you post asking for information from a message board, you are going to get multiple viewpoints - DUH! You are also going to get responses in multiple tones of voice, some of which you are not going to like. However, the vets who spend their time responding to the OP have in mind not only the OP but also the many many others who will read the thread, and even if the answer is not one the OP wants to hear, or the tone of voice is not one the OP appreciates, we vets are NOT only responding to the OP, but also writing for the many many lurkers, both now and who may find this thread later while doing their research. The answer and the tone of voice may be important to THEM, even if the OP doesn't appreciate it.

If the OP doesn't want to hear what she doesn't want to hear, there is an "ignore" feature on this site.

There is a reason my avatar is labeled "Bad Cop."

 

[Spiky Bugger]

...

There is a reason my avatar is labeled "Bad Cop."

Yeah...and I'm pissed that you got the title...lol

 

[robs477]

I do have two questions for you guys. How come you all are SO high on blowing Dr. Ayoola’s bugle? I just want to know some facts not just “you need to go to DFW”…I know he trained under Dr. Stewart, but, he is not the legendary Dr. Stewart, he is a different person. For an initial over the phone preliminary evaluation, I did call a couple of weeks ago and talked to his staff regarding the logistics of doing this and was significantly impressed with their professionalism, answering of questions such as number of DS’s done, mortality rates etc….SO…my basic question is, what are some facts, i.e., why do all of you’ll think he’s the guy and…is it possible that you maybe allowing some of the Stewart reputation to bias your recommendations maybe even unconsciously??? I need to know some more specifics because if my Dr. Wilson visit don’t pan out, going to DFW still may have to happen.

 

[JackieOnLine]

I posted this on the FB page, and reposting here. If I weren't a widow and didn't have responsibilities to multiple people and had functional family within a day's drive it would be one thing. But I don't. And, being honest, I'm getting tired of being told that I'm going to ruin my life if I don't make a trip that I can't manage and I'm about ready to just give up on asking anyone for help that works because obviously my personal circumstances are less important than browbeating me over my options.

I'm doing the best I can with what I can and within the parameters that work for my life.

I'm sorry you are having such a rough time. people really are trying to help, even when it doesn't feel like it.

 

[hilary1617]

@Robs577, you'll have to continue doing your own research and make the best choice for you. I don't know anyone who has the time to research doctors to neatly lay out the facts for prospective patients. Most are willing to be kind enough to share what they've seen and heard and their own experiences.

Frankly, I'm not sure Dr. Ayoola is any of the vet's top pick - most here would probably recommend going to Dr. K in California as the very best bet. But Dr.A. does seem to have a longer track record than other possibilities in TX. With that experience, there haven't been many complaints that I've seen on WLS boards.

I don't see anyone SO High on tooting Dr. A's horn here. I just see no one really knowing much about Dr. Wilson and some pretty scary malpractice history for the other doc mentioned in this thread.

Wishing you the best in your due diligence. You've got a lot of work cut out for you.

 

[robs477]

@Robs577, you'll have to continue doing your own research and make the best choice for you. I don't know anyone who has the time to research doctors to neatly lay out the facts for prospective patients. Most are willing to be kind enough to share what they've seen and heard and their own experiences.

Frankly, I'm not sure Dr. Ayoola is any of the vet's top pick - most here would probably recommend going to Dr. K in California as the very best bet. But Dr.A. does seem to have a longer track record than other possibilities in TX. With that experience, there haven't been many complaints that I've seen on WLS boards.

I don't see anyone SO High on tooting Dr. A's horn here. I just see no one really knowing much about Dr. Wilson and some pretty scary malpractice history for the other doc mentioned in this thread.

Wishing you the best in your due diligence. You've got a lot of work cut out for you.

Thxs for your reply and your perspective. I maybe should have worded it differently. I have been doing a TON of research and this has got to be the hardest part. But yeah, you’re kind of right. By not seeing anything, that is actually something because people sometimes only post when things go wrong. I’m just trying to learn and absorb every single thing I can, that’s all…and, sometimes my wording may seem aggressive, but, I have a joking type personality and preface a lot of things with humor.


BTW, I read your previous posts and so sorry about the loss of your friend.

 

[Spiky Bugger]

I do have two questions for you guys. How come you all are SO high on blowing Dr. Ayoola’s bugle? I just want to know some facts not just “you need to go to DFW”…I know he trained under Dr. Stewart, but, he is not the legendary Dr. Stewart, he is a different person. For an initial over the phone preliminary evaluation, I did call a couple of weeks ago and talked to his staff regarding the logistics of doing this and was significantly impressed with their professionalism, answering of questions such as number of DS’s done, mortality rates etc….SO…my basic question is, what are some facts, i.e., why do all of you’ll think he’s the guy and…is it possible that you maybe allowing some of the Stewart reputation to bias your recommendations maybe even unconsciously??? I need to know some more specifics because if my Dr. Wilson visit don’t pan out, going to DFW still may have to happen.

Essentially, what Hilary said. IMHO, Ayoola is still kind of a "noobie," (maybe because I've been reading about bariatric surgeons for 12+ years and he has only a couple of years of clinical practice per the Virginia med. board.) But I have heard of him, he has had positive reviews and I haven't encountered anything negative.

Wilson? Doesn't ring a bell...except that people have said that he (one of the Wilsons) tries to talk them out of the DS because it's too dangerous. (From my understanding, the PRIMARY dangers with the DS are surgeons who don't know what they are doing and patients who ignore the need to have labs done regularly and kill themselves via neglect...or sometimes booze. I could be wrong, but that is my observation.)

Some of us may sound to you like we are blowing a bugle. But you are starting to sound to me like you are determined to reinvent the wheel. We keep saying, "Right here...see? This is round and has a cute little thing in the middle where we can hook it up to stuff and it will help us with our work." And your answer keeps coming back as, "But see...I've got this cool tree and a butter knife..."

 

[southernlady]

I do have two questions for you guys. How come you all are SO high on blowing Dr. Ayoola’s bugle? I just want to know some facts not just “you need to go to DFW”…I know he trained under Dr. Stewart, but, he is not the legendary Dr. Stewart, he is a different person. For an initial over the phone preliminary evaluation, I did call a couple of weeks ago and talked to his staff regarding the logistics of doing this and was significantly impressed with their professionalism, answering of questions such as number of DS’s done, mortality rates etc….SO…my basic question is, what are some facts, i.e., why do all of you’ll think he’s the guy and…is it possible that you maybe allowing some of the Stewart reputation to bias your recommendations maybe even unconsciously??? I need to know some more specifics because if my Dr. Wilson visit don’t pan out, going to DFW still may have to happen.

Maybe because a DS'er who is also a PCP interviewed Dr. Ayoola after Dr. Stewart's passing. That person is almost 4 years out now and several of his family members were DSer's under Dr. Stewart. This PCP was VERY impressed with Dr. A's answers and knowledge.

That goes a long way in this group.

No, Dr. Ayoola is not Dr. K or Dr. Rabkin but he is a good solid option in the TX area.

 

[DianaCox]

What was said above - and note that we do NOT recommend Ayoola as an RNY to DS revision surgeon either. Our "endorsement" of Ayoola is based on him having been trained by Stewart, feedback from patients of the practice, outcomes so far, and some very thoughtful observations that have been communicated by a DSer familiar with the practice who is also a physician, and whose opinion we respect. If that isn't enough for you (and it should at best be a factor and not the be-all and end-all of your research), you should ask more questions of your own.

 

[robs477]

Essentially, what Hilary said. IMHO, Ayoola is still kind of a "noobie," (maybe because I've been reading about bariatric surgeons for 12+ years and he has only a couple of years of clinical practice per the Virginia med. board.) But I have heard of him, he has had positive reviews and I haven't encountered anything negative.

Wilson? Doesn't ring a bell...except that people have said that he (one of the Wilsons) tries to talk them out of the DS because it's too dangerous. (From my understanding, the PRIMARY dangers with the DS are surgeons who don't know what they are doing and patients who ignore the need to have labs done regularly and kill themselves via neglect...or sometimes booze. I could be wrong, but that is my observation.)

Some of us may sound to you like we are blowing a bugle. But you are starting to sound to me like you are determined to reinvent the wheel. We keep saying, "Right here...see? This is round and has a cute little thing in the middle where we can hook it up to stuff and it will help us with our work." And your answer keeps coming back as, "But see...I've got this cool tree and a butter knife..."

Again, I really appreciate all the tips, advice etc, but in the end, it is our decision based on all the weighted facts I’ve gathered and still gathering. I also have some really burdensome family challenges right now that I don’t care to discuss in an online forum that would make it extremely difficult to do this in Dallas. It might end up that way, but, time will tell. That is also why I understand Bywaters predicament also because of logistics and family issues. You guys don’t know all the variables and challenges every other person faces as we all have different circumstances as do all of you….So, again, Thxs for the inputs and helping to fill pieces of this challenging puzzle.

 

[southernlady]

Again, I really appreciate all the tips, advice etc, but in the end, it is our decision based on all the weighted facts I’ve gathered and still gathering. I also have some really burdensome family challenges right now that I don’t care to discuss in an online forum that would make it extremely difficult to do this in Dallas. It might end up that way, but, time will tell. That is also why I understand Bywaters predicament also because of logistics and family issues. You guys don’t know all the variables and challenges every other person faces as we all have different circumstances as do all of you….So, again, Thxs for the inputs and helping to fill pieces of this challenging puzzle.

Yes, it is your decision.

IF you go to someone other than Dr. Ayoola, be very CLEAR about your wishes...ask all the questions...
How many DS's has that person done?
His/her complication rate?
Who he/she proctored under to learn the surgery?

Answers to those questions AND talking to other DS'ers he/she has done in support groups go a LONG way.