I just noticed that you have been on this diet for exactly 2-1/2 years. I don’t know how you did it! What are your results? Any progress towards getting your hernia repaired? Not that you would want to be in a hospital anytime soon ... but have you found a surgeon?
Isn't that disgusting? If you weigh me on the right day of the week, my BMI is... Wait for it... NORMAL. For the first time in my DS life. Well, actually in my whole adult life. But I am intentionally not making much noise about it because I am afraid I will eat something and screw it up. Or smell something really amazing and gain 25lbs. Normal seems to be extremely stressful to me. And I never thought I would get here. Scares me to death to think I might just be visiting. I am good at dieting. I do have willpower. But the weight always comes back historically speaking. This is not my first diet that has lasted more than 2 years.
One of the neighbors sent us a tin of popcorn. And it is cheat day you know. So, I ate some. After I ate I thought wow, I have not even tasted popcorn in probably 10 years. Holy buckets. Popcorn may well be a better laxative than the SF gummy bears. Too bad it is carbs.
The hernia. The thinner I get, the more pregnant I look. Oh the irony. I reach a normal BMI once in my life and I look like a pregnant old bag wearing a skin suit that is 4 sizes too big. I have found one possible surgeon. I am not excited about him but he may be OK. Haven't talked to him yet, just found him online and did some reading. Not many choices here. Now if I wanted boobs it would be a different story. As soon as the weight was gone and I had insurance, COVID happened. I have been avoiding doctors completely. I don't want to be around sick people/hospitals unless it is necessary. Looks like I won't get the vaccine till Spring. I sort of figure, shot, wait 3 weeks, shot, wait 3 weeks and then I can actually go see him. If I see him in the Summer, that most likely means surgery at the end of summer. And of course I am ASSUMING I will find a way to play let's make a deal for a reasonable amount of money, and get him to just do a huge incision. chop off the panni, and pull down the skin from my upper abdomen. No dissection required. The hernia already did that work. I can lift up the skin. It is entertaining in a gross way. Maybe a little Mets work around the belly button but that's it. I expect the BB will just be gone and I am fine with that. Since I have lost all the weight, I can actually find the hole. I know exactly where it is and how big it is.
Now that I have hated on my hernia, it may have also helped me lose some of the weight. I know if I eat too much, I will be in pain. That makes it easier to not eat too much. Also it looks gross. You can actually see the loops of my small intestine under my skin. If I want to look human...I don't eat for a day before my event/whatever.
