What's your attitude now?

[robs477]

Very interesting thread...shines a spotlight into some classic human behaviors. One thing I've noticed, as I've started a new job recently and only 4 people there new me as fat, is how many derogatory remarks are said about fat people on a daily basis by thin people. It was truly shocking to me to hear, as I was never privy to this kind of talk because I was "one of them". Any general conversation about food can turn on a dime and become hurtful rhetoric about one of my heavier coworkers. It's really sad and I can't help but wonder about how I must have been discussed in the past by people who were always nice to my face. Has anyone else found this kind of vitriol so prevalent? Or did I just join a hospital loaded with loathing and disgust for those who are obese? I always knew that obesity was the last tolerated area of discrimination, but man alive I had no idea it was that intense!

Yup, I agree 100000%. I think it is our biggest most profound and most deeply seated of discriminations. So much so, that its really the "norm" and some people dont even know theyre doing it.

 

[Razbry]

Hilary I have been to a Penn & Teller Show as well. How did they do the fish trick? Will....fat shaming and discrimination abounds everywhere.

 

[Elizabeth N.]

Yup Will, it's everywhere. No matter where you go, it's open season on fat people.

 

[Will2014]

Yup Will, it's everywhere. No matter where you go, it's open season on fat people.

It's sad but so true Elizabeth. We can only try to advocate for the truth whenever and wherever we can!

 

[more2adore]

My personality won't change, I don't think, post-VSG - As an adult, I've always been a friendly extrovert who has an easy time making friends and loves to be the center of attention. I wouldn't have gone into PR as a profession if that weren't the person I am.

But I do imagine I'm going to be treated very differently by strangers on the street, as @DuodenalSwitchaRoo has said. Right now, I can't walk down the street in Australia without children (and sometimes adults) stopping and pointing and saying things about me. I can't walk around tourist attractions here without having my photo taken by tourists from China. It's VERY dehumanizing, honestly.

 

[Razbry]

More2adore I think many of us have experienced something similar. Please know you are not alone. Humanity still has a long way to go. It is interesting, however, to see that at this point in history big butts are now being admired. The whole social acceptance of body image is always evolving. As for me, yes I love having a socially acceptable body, but I love my health even more. Keep going!

 

[hilary1617]

@more2adore, I'm so sorry about your experience with tourists. I'd recommend you bring your own camera to take pictures of people taking pictures of you to give them a taste of their own medicine. Idiots!

This reminds me that one thing I really do miss post-DS is the way my body served as an instant-idiot-detector. Now that most people are kind to me up front, it takes longer when I meet people to figure out who to avoid. Much more of a need now to rely on my "spidey sense" / gut feel combined with an extended observation period..

 

[robs477]

@more2adore, I'm so sorry about your experience with tourists. I'd recommend you bring your own camera to take pictures of people taking pictures of you to give them a taste of their own medicine. Idiots!

This reminds me that one thing I really do miss post-DS is the way my body served as an instant-idiot-detector. Now that most people are kind to me up front, it takes longer when I meet people to figure out who to avoid. Much more of a need now to rely on my "spidey sense" / gut feel combined with an extended observation period..

GREAT advice! and very profound thought provoking observations! So....@hilary1617....what is the deal with you (and or your photographer)??? I swear to God, you just dont take a bad picture....lol That ones awesome too .

 

[more2adore]

I've loved my in-laws since the first time I met them. They are truly kind, good-hearted people and they've never given their son even the slightest bit of flack for his taste in women (he's always loved larger ladies). They decided when he and his brother were very young that they were going to 100% support whomever made their sons happy, and they've stuck to that.

Anyway, the night before our wedding, we had a small "rehearsal dinner" as we called it. It was really just me, my mom, hubby and his parents eating dinner at their hotel, lol. As I walked in to the hotel, there was a tourist there taking pics of me. I rolled my eyes at it basically and pointed it out to hubby, like "again?!" He then pointed it out to his dad... who was INFURIATED, and followed the woman with HIS camera, onto the elevator, taking photos of her the whole way up to her floor. I already adored the man, but that cemented it. Haha. I'm very lucky to have such great inlaws.

 

[Will2014]

I've loved my in-laws since the first time I met them. They are truly kind, good-hearted people and they've never given their son even the slightest bit of flack for his taste in women (he's always loved larger ladies). They decided when he and his brother were very young that they were going to 100% support whomever made their sons happy, and they've stuck to that.

Anyway, the night before our wedding, we had a small "rehearsal dinner" as we called it. It was really just me, my mom, hubby and his parents eating dinner at their hotel, lol. As I walked in to the hotel, there was a tourist there taking pics of me. I rolled my eyes at it basically and pointed it out to hubby, like "again?!" He then pointed it out to his dad... who was INFURIATED, and followed the woman with HIS camera, onto the elevator, taking photos of her the whole way up to her floor. I already adored the man, but that cemented it. Haha. I'm very lucky to have such great inlaws.

ROFL! What a great story!! It sure does sound like you've got a great family there. The simple fact that his fatherly "protect and defend" reflex was triggered and compelled him to act on your behalf, indicates to me that he has fully embraced you as part of his family. Loyalty!! It's a wonderful thing to see in action.

 

[newanatomy]

My personality won't change, I don't think, post-VSG - As an adult, I've always been a friendly extrovert who has an easy time making friends and loves to be the center of attention. I wouldn't have gone into PR as a profession if that weren't the person I am.

But I do imagine I'm going to be treated very differently by strangers on the street, as @DuodenalSwitchaRoo has said. Right now, I can't walk down the street in Australia without children (and sometimes adults) stopping and pointing and saying things about me. I can't walk around tourist attractions here without having my photo taken by tourists from China. It's VERY dehumanizing, honestly.

That is sick! I would give them something to photograph like me giving them the bird! Unimaginable rudeness!!

 

[robs477]

ROFL! What a great story!! It sure does sound like you've got a great family there. The simple fact that his fatherly "protect and defend" reflex was triggered and compelled him to act on your behalf, indicates to me that he has fully embraced you as part of his family. Loyalty!! It's a wonderful thing to see in action.

ABSOLUTELY!! From Father percpective, I agree 100%. Talks flippin cheap, but actions speak louder than any words!

 

[robs477]

I went to bed thinking about this. It really bothered me when I read it yesterday. I just cant wrap my brain around it? people doing that, being that friggin insensitve and rude???? Ive said many times, that what some people do NEVER surprises me anymore. And then I read something like that and have to eat my own words AGAIN.

 

[more2adore]

Hubby and I were on our honeymoon in a small, but touristy area. We were at an overlook, checking out a beautiful mountain range. There was a huge crowd of tourists there and I was trying to dodge having my photo taken left and right. Then this nice-seeming couple came up and asked if we wanted them to take a picture of us on my phone. Of course, being honeymooners, we said yes. As the man took our photo with our camera, the wife got out HER camera and took a photo of us, thinking we wouldn't notice. Of course, I did. Afterwards, the man handed our camera back and then asked if he could take some photos of us. Of course I said no. It just makes me feel so dehumanized... having to dodge these people everywhere I go.

 

[robs477]

@more2adore ....Hey, just as an FYI, being a numbers nerd...lol and just going by percentages...going by your WL ticker...you are 36.4% to your EWL goal! Thats over 1/3 of the way there! I think thats pretty significant!