How does one fail/ break their surgery?

[newanatomy]

The hardest thing for me to learn about my DS was: "the more I ate, the more I lost". My brain just would not wrap around that fact. Pre-op, I gained weight on an 800 calorie a day diet. I was an expert dieter and probably would have weighed twice as much if I had not dieted for 40+ years. I finally quit trying to analyze it and ate more. It took me 3 years to lose all of my excess weight and it will be 10 years in June since I have had surgery. The weight is still gone.

I love your story!

 

[robs477]

The hardest thing for me to learn about my DS was: "the more I ate, the more I lost". My brain just would not wrap around that fact. Pre-op, I gained weight on an 800 calorie a day diet. I was an expert dieter and probably would have weighed twice as much if I had not dieted for 40+ years. I finally quit trying to analyze it and ate more. It took me 3 years to lose all of my excess weight and it will be 10 years in June since I have had surgery. The weight is still gone.

@SHales.........Your post REALLY rang my bell probably more than any on this thread. You ARE describing me EXACTLY and I really am starting to think that’s what’s going on with me, I’m NOT eating enough. JUST like you, I SWEAR TO GOD please strike me dead if Im lying, if I went over 800 calories per day, I would gain weight. For my size, I should have to eat 3500 just to break even according to “The Math”…lol

And…I also, like you have NO regrets, because if I did eat normal for the last 36 years and didn’t live in that constant state of diet and deprivation, I have NO DOUBT that I would have been one of those 600 lb men.

I think I FINALLY really get it regarding needing to eat more. EVERY Vet on this thread is saying that, so, two days ago, that’s what I’ve started to do.

I think what’s happened “Pre-DS” is that when we ate something, we gained so fast and then freaked out of course and backed off and we could NEVER get the metabolism “Stoked” enough to get it out of that “I’m starving self-preservation retention mode”. I think what must happen “Post-DS”, is we can now eat enough to get us out of that “I’m starving self-preservation retention mode”, but then our bodies can only absorb half of it so we actually get the metabolic boost from eating but don’t get the caloric detriments associated with actually absorbing but half of it which equals a net weight loss!!!!

The secret is to find the right balance to enable the triggers and the metabolic turn on without going to the other end of the spectrum and as everyone has said, experiment, be open to changes and just let it rip!!!!! I FINALLY get it! Your post somehow tied it altogether for me and with all the other info from the other posts, I can FINALLY wrap my head around that whole “Eating concept” without fear for the first time in 36 yrs! Going to try it anyway! THANK YOU so much for taking the time to reply and post your story!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

BTW....If you dont mind me asking, how much weight did you finally loose?

 

[SHales]

I lost 144#.

 

[newanatomy]

I lost 144#.

No wonder I love your story, that is just about my goal!

 

[DuodenalSwitchaRoo]

I needed to see this today.

My thinking is getting foggy and I've been contemplating dieting. The reason? I have an appointment with the bariatric dietician on April 10th. Last time she made me feel like super duper shit. First off she read my notes wrong and thought I had lost nothing, then talked over me as I tried to correct her mistake, and she berated asking me "and how do you think you are doing?" ugh. I cried for hours after that appointment. When in fact I had lost 5kg in the 1.5 months since my previous appointment.

Thus, seeing her is now a trigger. I saw her in Sept last year and I've only lost 18kg since then. Im bricking it. She refuses to take on board that Im a 2 stager and will lose slower, nor does she acknowledge I am cripple. Cannot even stand up straight. My showers are filled with tears and swearing that would make a sailor blush. Still. I feel like a failure.

I don't know what to do. meh.

Also, my 1 year came and went and no appointment from surgeon so I have to go see this cunt to get my bloods drawn. ugh.

Sorry to be a Debbie Downer. I just feel like the poster child for a lifetime fatty. :/

 

[robs477]

I needed to see this today.

My thinking is getting foggy and I've been contemplating dieting. The reason? I have an appointment with the bariatric dietician on April 10th. Last time she made me feel like super duper shit. First off she read my notes wrong and thought I had lost nothing, then talked over me as I tried to correct her mistake, and she berated asking me "and how do you think you are doing?" ugh. I cried for hours after that appointment. When in fact I had lost 5kg in the 1.5 months since my previous appointment.

Thus, seeing her is now a trigger. I saw her in Sept last year and I've only lost 18kg since then. Im bricking it. She refuses to take on board that Im a 2 stager and will lose slower, nor does she acknowledge I am cripple. Cannot even stand up straight. My showers are filled with tears and swearing that would make a sailor blush. Still. I feel like a failure.

I don't know what to do. meh.

Also, my 1 year came and went and no appointment from surgeon so I have to go see this cunt to get my bloods drawn. ugh.

Sorry to be a Debbie Downer. I just feel like the poster child for a lifetime fatty. :/

Sweetheart, you are ANYTHING but a failure! Look at what you’ve accomplished! I didn’t even recognize you in the picture until I looked at the name! F@*# all those asswipe “normies” with their normal metabolisms in jobs they are grossly under qualified to give advice for and whom will NEVER understand what it’s like to be you/us and that YOU WERE BORN with those challenges and have overcome in spite of nature purely out of your willpower and a little science. Just keep on keep-in on and everything will be all right !!

 

[DuodenalSwitchaRoo]

Sweetheart, you are ANYTHING but a failure! Look at what you’ve accomplished! I didn’t even recognize you in the picture until I looked at the name! F@*# all those asswipe “normies” with their normal metabolisms in jobs they are grossly under qualified to give advice for and whom will NEVER understand what it’s like to be you/us and that YOU WERE BORN with those challenges and have overcome in spite of nature purely out of your willpower and a little science. Just keep on keep-in on and everything will be all right !!

Thank you

The nice, people pleaser in me really needs die. I just can't shake the hurt that comes from disappointing people! All my life I have envied the people who have thick skin and are assertive.

Meh. You are right though, screw her! It's just stressing me out. So far I have resisted starving myself AND resisted binging...so that to me is a success!

Thanks for the uplift.

 

[chevtow]

I needed to see this today.

My thinking is getting foggy and I've been contemplating dieting. The reason? I have an appointment with the bariatric dietician on April 10th. Last time she made me feel like super duper shit. First off she read my notes wrong and thought I had lost nothing, then talked over me as I tried to correct her mistake, and she berated asking me "and how do you think you are doing?" ugh. I cried for hours after that appointment. When in fact I had lost 5kg in the 1.5 months since my previous appointment.

Thus, seeing her is now a trigger. I saw her in Sept last year and I've only lost 18kg since then. Im bricking it. She refuses to take on board that Im a 2 stager and will lose slower, nor does she acknowledge I am cripple. Cannot even stand up straight. My showers are filled with tears and swearing that would make a sailor blush. Still. I feel like a failure.

I don't know what to do. meh.

Also, my 1 year came and went and no appointment from surgeon so I have to go see this cunt to get my bloods drawn. ugh.

Sorry to be a Debbie Downer. I just feel like the poster child for a lifetime fatty. :/

I actually cancelled my last dietitian appointment and told my surgeon that I will not be going to anymore of them. I told him straight out that the advice she was giving me would result in gas, the shits, and less weight loss, so why should I pay for that? He didn't seem too worried about it.

Can't you see a regular doctor for blood draws rather than the super bitch? You're her customer, not the other way around. Someone treats me like that and they'll get a loud "Fuck off" and then a nice call to their superiors explaining what a complete waste of oxygen their piece of shit employee is.

Don't let her get you down !!!

 

[DuodenalSwitchaRoo]

I actually cancelled my last dietitian appointment and told my surgeon that I will not be going to anymore of them. I told him straight out that the advice she was giving me would result in gas, the shits, and less weight loss, so why should I pay for that? He didn't seem too worried about it.

Can't you see a regular doctor for blood draws rather than the super bitch? You're her customer, not the other way around. Someone treats me like that and they'll get a loud "Fuck off" and then a nice call to their superiors explaining what a complete waste of oxygen their piece of shit employee is.

Don't let her get you down !!!

Ha. On the NHS, Im not a customer, just a patient

I had my GP order labs and she did, but the hospital near me were able to pull B1, B2 or B6. Kinda a waste. ugh. I just have so much anger towards this dietician it is unreal. Im trying my hardest not to crack. I've had so much shit go wrong and the lighter I get, the more cripple I am. My sanity is hanging on by a thread....she would be wise not to sever that thread

And if I told her to "Fuck Off" I would be arrested lol. Oh the joys!

 

[DuodenalSwitchaRoo]

Also, at what point is it ok to feel like I have failed? I see people passing me by, getting skinny...and Im sat here, twiddling my thumbs!!! ugh. Trying hard not to have a pity party! I would ideally like to lose another 100lbs, but I can't even seem to shift 10 at the moment. I stumble near landmark weights. Ive been trying to get to 322 so I would be exactly half my start weight and it has been an uphill battle.

 

[chevtow]

I think you've kicked ass. 320lbs lost is an incredible accomplishment !

I forget you're not in the USA so your healthcare system is different

 

[newanatomy]

@DuodenalSwitchaRoo, When she talks over you just stop talking. Wait until she stops talking then, wait a little longer then, ask if you may finish what you were trying to say. Any advice she gives you nod and shuffle. We all have to do this to some degree. You're a badass bitch, you've got this!

 

[Brandy]

I stumble near landmark weights.

Oh god, me too. Once I realized I was in striking distance of -100 lbs, I got weird and set myself back a month or two. I finally forced myself to ignore it and stopped all tracking and just tried to eat more good stuff.

I wish you had more choices about seeing her.

I too find it hard not to be nice to people. I think it should be considered a character strength! My brother-in-law is an ass who believes that he has been put on earth to give others "Tough Love". I have never gotten him to back off totally, but now days he only does in in email, which is automatically forwarded to my husband and deleted from my account. My hubby has occasionally replied to him from my machine, but my life is much better without even seeing his crap. Maybe you could write an email to the NUT so that the appointment goes the way you want it to. Tell her exactly what you want from her (blood tests) and how any comments she has about your diet or your success she can put in writing (which you never have to read.) Even if she doesn't follow your directives to start out with, you can cut off her venom and tell her to put it in her email. And who knows, if she is human underneath that, she might not know the damage she is causing until somebody tells her.

Good luck!

 

[SHales]

If you are forced to see this 'person', do what new anatomy said PLUS, put on your 'resting bitch face' and give back what you receive. Ask her very calmly if she is 'just the dietician' or did she get elected to a Judgeship position. Tell her that you would prefer to stick to business without any of her personal condescension. You can do it with 'the look' and calm unemotional discussion. When you get out of there, you have my permission to beat the shit out of anyone/anything that won't get you arrested. I wish I could come with you to your appointment, I have been grumpy for a while now..

 

[DianaCox]

I would love to be there too - I would slice and dice her and feed her to the fishes.