Jo777
Aug 2017
- Joined
- Jan 5, 2014
- Messages
- 485
We got her discharged from the rehab center Weds night.. Met the home-health nurse who will be doing 3x weekly visits to help her with her meds (a smart-medication box will be installed soon, it will ring us if she doesn't open it to take her doses) and they will step up her physical rehab to help her get stronger, and keep her hopefully independent for as long as she can be in the boonies on her own.. I fear she's going to go nuttier from lack of social outlets.. no husband to talk at, not a lot of visitors.. she made friends with the other pts at rehab, I'm sure she misses them, all she has at home are two cats.
Issues, rants, etc.: mom tells Todd a list of things she wants in the house, of course loaded with sweets and carby crap.. I pick my battles and decide, fuck-it, I'll buy the junk for her. These things she has not had much access to in rehab, hence why her BG was decent, that and they put her on meds.. and made her take them.
First thing she does upon coming leaving the center (we drove separate, so I could prep stuff ahead of her arrival home) is make Todd stop at the store so she can get 3 packs of Hostess cupcakes, candybars, and a huge iced Starbucks 46g sugar-bomb.. No surprise, when the intake nurse tested her BG later, it was high. Dietary counselling is in order, but unlikely she will change. She has likely lost 20-25lbs in rehab through the typical 1800 ADA dietary menu (sucky for diabetics, really!) they had her on, it's going to come raging back. Eh, can't control her.. she's an adult.
Cigarettes. Enough said about that..
No driving, licence is gone-gone.. and Medicare doesn't cover transportation, so anytime she needs to run to the store etc, it's going to be quite the process.
The phone calls will not stop.. they were often when she was in rehab, and now she's at home, she seems to be falling right back into the helpless routine (which she didn't do at the center) so this will be fun..
Family: getting my sisters to help.. one is handling, kinda, the finances.. but I'm seeing by the lack of communication etc that she's not quite on it as I thought she would be.. I am not going to take over that part of it, no way. There needs to be some shared load, and she CAN do it from CT. My other sister, not really going to be that helpful.. for many reasons.. she can call & do checks on mom via phone, and at some point, she will likely come out for another extended stay as she did for dad when he was dying.. She gave 6weeks of her life up to help him.. and she's got her own demons, physical and relationship-wise she's battling right now, one I hope is not recurrent cancer.. she had thyroid cancer, and just went though a node biopsy & more thyroid tissue removed, tissue that wasn't supposed to be there.. waiting to hear results.
Yes, we have been very forthcoming on communication, and it has been acknowledged that we are handing the majority of the heavy-lifting out here.. but I have stated very plainly, once she is stable and situated, we ARE taking a huge step back and she will have to sink or swim on her own accord.. Todd & I need our lives back..
This process from the time my dad passed in June to now has been the most exhausting and stress-filled situation I've ever been in.. no surprise.
The good stuff:
My health has been good despite it, and my self-medicating issues with alcohol have been reigned in and put back to a normal level of occasional adult beverages out, for fun, not because I'm in a shitty state of mind.. My weight is higher than I prefer, but that's also coming back into balance, especially since I'm not drinking daily anymore. I am also back on (again) my Wellbutrin and Sam-e cocktail that seems to help.. esp as S.A.D. time is approaching again.
I am currently in the middle of a couple initial interviews for a job, and looking forward to trying to restart my own life with my husband again.. *swing some critters for me that the one I really want - legal assistant/office manager for a solo elder law attny, I get*.. I did the initial chat, prior to the job even being posted as I have a personal in with her current help, but she wants to field some more applicants, then did quite a bit deeper as she has been burned by a bad staff before. So I have been alerted it will be later this month before things move.. the other interview I have coming up is just a job-job with a corporate dental company, that at least on Glassdoor.com doesn't sound all too appealing, but they offer management CE courses, and a paycheck.. it's something.
That's about it.. just felt like putting it out there as it seems to help cement things for me if I write them out and share them vs just keeping it to me & T.
Issues, rants, etc.: mom tells Todd a list of things she wants in the house, of course loaded with sweets and carby crap.. I pick my battles and decide, fuck-it, I'll buy the junk for her. These things she has not had much access to in rehab, hence why her BG was decent, that and they put her on meds.. and made her take them.
First thing she does upon coming leaving the center (we drove separate, so I could prep stuff ahead of her arrival home) is make Todd stop at the store so she can get 3 packs of Hostess cupcakes, candybars, and a huge iced Starbucks 46g sugar-bomb.. No surprise, when the intake nurse tested her BG later, it was high. Dietary counselling is in order, but unlikely she will change. She has likely lost 20-25lbs in rehab through the typical 1800 ADA dietary menu (sucky for diabetics, really!) they had her on, it's going to come raging back. Eh, can't control her.. she's an adult.
Cigarettes. Enough said about that..
No driving, licence is gone-gone.. and Medicare doesn't cover transportation, so anytime she needs to run to the store etc, it's going to be quite the process.
The phone calls will not stop.. they were often when she was in rehab, and now she's at home, she seems to be falling right back into the helpless routine (which she didn't do at the center) so this will be fun..
Family: getting my sisters to help.. one is handling, kinda, the finances.. but I'm seeing by the lack of communication etc that she's not quite on it as I thought she would be.. I am not going to take over that part of it, no way. There needs to be some shared load, and she CAN do it from CT. My other sister, not really going to be that helpful.. for many reasons.. she can call & do checks on mom via phone, and at some point, she will likely come out for another extended stay as she did for dad when he was dying.. She gave 6weeks of her life up to help him.. and she's got her own demons, physical and relationship-wise she's battling right now, one I hope is not recurrent cancer.. she had thyroid cancer, and just went though a node biopsy & more thyroid tissue removed, tissue that wasn't supposed to be there.. waiting to hear results.
Yes, we have been very forthcoming on communication, and it has been acknowledged that we are handing the majority of the heavy-lifting out here.. but I have stated very plainly, once she is stable and situated, we ARE taking a huge step back and she will have to sink or swim on her own accord.. Todd & I need our lives back..
This process from the time my dad passed in June to now has been the most exhausting and stress-filled situation I've ever been in.. no surprise.
The good stuff:
My health has been good despite it, and my self-medicating issues with alcohol have been reigned in and put back to a normal level of occasional adult beverages out, for fun, not because I'm in a shitty state of mind.. My weight is higher than I prefer, but that's also coming back into balance, especially since I'm not drinking daily anymore. I am also back on (again) my Wellbutrin and Sam-e cocktail that seems to help.. esp as S.A.D. time is approaching again.
I am currently in the middle of a couple initial interviews for a job, and looking forward to trying to restart my own life with my husband again.. *swing some critters for me that the one I really want - legal assistant/office manager for a solo elder law attny, I get*.. I did the initial chat, prior to the job even being posted as I have a personal in with her current help, but she wants to field some more applicants, then did quite a bit deeper as she has been burned by a bad staff before. So I have been alerted it will be later this month before things move.. the other interview I have coming up is just a job-job with a corporate dental company, that at least on Glassdoor.com doesn't sound all too appealing, but they offer management CE courses, and a paycheck.. it's something.
That's about it.. just felt like putting it out there as it seems to help cement things for me if I write them out and share them vs just keeping it to me & T.
