Surgery and mental health

[Ainu]

Hello everyone. Some of you guys know me, some do not, but this is a bit of information that I find extremely important when it comes to any life changing event. Specifically this weight loss surgery.

A lot of us have mental health issues. It may or may not be why we ended up in this position.

I know I had it in my head that weight loss= cure for my major depression. While it has made so many things in my life better, I still have major depression. It's just what it is.

Please, please don't think this surgery will be a cure for that. Don't set yourself up for that and be disappointed.

Not being morbidly obese is a huge, HUGE relief to some of the feelings I struggled with, but they're still there in the background.

Be strong. See your head doctors. Keep up with what you need to.

My sister (who got the RNY after I had my DS) and I joked about how we'd look into the mirror and said, "I'm fat and depressed."

Then we lost weight and looked into the mirror and said, "well...now I'm just depressed."

This is, of course, anecdotal but I hope it can help someone out there

 

[Spiky Bugger]

Excellent advice.

And another oldie…ESPECIALLY for those who were obese during puberty and adolescence:

They will probably hit on you now. And you may enjoy it. But still, it’s not a great idea to make up for all that lost time the minute you no longer need an airline safety belt extender. For too many, obesity departs and insanity arrives. Slow down. Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

 

[Ainu]

Oh yeah. I love the attention most of the time but the harassment at work gets...a little much.

I've been with my husband for years before I had surgery and we powered through all of the struggles together. My coworkers KNOW I'm married. They even know my husband, but they still feel like it's okay to try and get something from me.

I was definitely fat through puberty and my 20s. While I'm sad I can't have the whole dating and mating experience, I'm glad that I have a partner that I KNOW loves me for me and not my body.

 

[Slhernandez]

Hello all, my son is 14 years out from DS surgery. He is 38 weighs 170lbs and is 6'5". He was 24 when he had the DS. He is at a bad place physically & mentally. I have no idea were to turn to and neither does he. I need help to fix him. He is lost and so am I. I am begging for help which is a very hard thing for me to do because I feel I am strong enough to get it fixed but not this time. Please please ant advise is appreciated. Kindly Sharon

 

[Slhernandez]

Hello everyone. Some of you guys know me, some do not, but this is a bit of information that I find extremely important when it comes to any life changing event. Specifically this weight loss surgery.

A lot of us have mental health issues. It may or may not be why we ended up in this position.

I know I had it in my head that weight loss= cure for my major depression. While it has made so many things in my life better, I still have major depression. It's just what it is.

Please, please don't think this surgery will be a cure for that. Don't set yourself up for that and be disappointed.

Not being morbidly obese is a huge, HUGE relief to some of the feelings I struggled with, but they're still there in the background.

Be strong. See your head doctors. Keep up with what you need to.

My sister (who got the RNY after I had my DS) and I joked about how we'd look into the mirror and said, "I'm fat and depressed."

Then we lost weight and looked into the mirror and said, "well...now I'm just depressed."

This is, of course, anecdotal but I hope it can help someone out there

 

[Slhernandez]

Hello Ainu, I need help for my son. I truly believe he is were he is at today because of the DS surgery. He currently is in a mental illness facility because of his mental instability from being depleated of what his body needs. So many doctors and no one understands the severity of what he is going thru. I need someone that will help. Any suggestions. This is gone on much to long. Any thing, please and thank you. Sharon

 

[southernlady]

Hello all, my son is 14 years out from DS surgery. He is 38 weighs 170lbs and is 6'5". He was 24 when he had the DS. He is at a bad place physically & mentally. I have no idea were to turn to and neither does he. I need help to fix him. He is lost and so am I. I am begging for help which is a very hard thing for me to do because I feel I am strong enough to get it fixed but not this time. Please please ant advise is appreciated. Kindly Sharon

At 38, he needs to be seeking help for himself. You can help but he is an adult. Unfortunately you can’t fix him. At 170 and 6’5”, he’s still a 20 BMI which is normal. Is his PCP in the loop? Is he having full DS labs pulled? https://bariatricfacts.org/threads/generic-ds-lab-order.191/
if his labs are all in upper range except for B6 and PTH (those need to be low normal), then his mental issues aren’t vitamin related. But he needs to find out. Because he is an adult, he has to do this and he has to WANT to do this.

It’s like alcoholism, the person affected has to fix themselves. Frustrating for family but that’s the way it is.

 

[Slhernandez]

At 38, he needs to be seeking help for himself. You can help but he is an adult. Unfortunately you can’t fix him. At 170 and 6’5”, he’s still a 20 BMI which is normal. Is his PCP in the loop? Is he having full DS labs pulled? https://bariatricfacts.org/threads/generic-ds-lab-order.191/
if his labs are all in upper range except for B6 and PTH (those need to be low normal), then his mental issues aren’t vitamin related. But he needs to find out. Because he is an adult, he has to do this and he has to WANT to do this.

It’s like alcoholism, the person affected has to fix themselves. Frustrating for family but that’s the way it is.

You are right,but i will neer give up.. this is my son.. Its a very long story on how he got to this point but no PCP at the time. He now is in the process of getting medicaid.

 

[Ainu]

Always be there for him but Southenlady is right, he needs to do this for himself.

If he's in a facility they should be willing/able to do lab work. He should be getting it yearly so he can catch anything that's off early. Playing catch-up with bad labs is a pain in the neck.

As for Medicaid, they will back pay bills up to.... I want to say 6 months but don't quote me. Help your son get the help he needs. A life shouldn't have a price tag (WAY easier said than done, I know.)

That said, I'm not sure any of us on here is qualified to offer real help. Talk to the facility, talk to your son, and get yourself a really good medicaid agent. Be the squeaky wheel. Don't stop pestering them until they help or give you the next steps moving forward.

 

[Spiky Bugger]

You are right,but i will neer give up.. this is my son.. Its a very long story on how he got to this point but no PCP at the time. He now is in the process of getting medicaid.

I disagree somewhat with those who say he needs to seek/find help for himself. I say that because SOMETIMES a mental health issue may be what is keeping someone from seeking help. That’s why there are laws like California’s “5150 hold,” which puts people, involuntarily, into evaluation for psych issues.

In this case, Slhernandez , you have not provided very much info…BUT, maybe enough to look into your belief that there is a relationship between the DS and his issues.

My guess, based on nothing, is that you might get better results if you:
•Stop thinking that the DS “caused” his problems, when PERHAPS, 14 years of (I’m guessing here) NOT doing all the things we need to do post-op and the resultant psych and physical problems is the actual cause. So NONCOMPLIANCE may be the cause, not the surgery itself. RnY gastric bypass people need to be aware of a condition known as “bariatric beriberi.” (Google it.) LOTS of problems due to thiamine deficiency.

•Again, not enough info here, but…IF you are in a position to get an attorney who can understand that bariatric surgeries can cause nutritional deficiencies that can, in turn, cause psychiatric issues…and that IF his situation is related to that issue…you might want to discuss conservatorship.

•MAYBE, if you are very good at intimidating people, you might find a way that you can cause his facility—to cover their asses—to run ALL the lab tests that might reveal any deficiencies and, if indicated, begin supplementation immediately.. Unfamiliarity with our need for nutritional supplementation will probably cause the facility to just add lots of psych drugs which won’t help at all.

•Finally, for now, his problems may be totally unrelated to his surgery. For example, his surgery was at age 24. Some issues, schizophrenia for one, has a usual onset age of 18-30. I’m just saying’.

Good luck.

 

[Slhernandez]

I disagree somewhat with those who say he needs to seek/find help for himself. I say that because SOMETIMES a mental health issue may be what is keeping someone from seeking help. That’s why there are laws like California’s “5150 hold,” which puts people, involuntarily, into evaluation for psych issues.

In this case, Slhernandez , you have not provided very much info…BUT, maybe enough to look into your belief that there is a relationship between the DS and his issues.

My guess, based on nothing, is that you might get better results if you:
•Stop thinking that the DS “caused” his problems, when PERHAPS, 14 years of (I’m guessing here) NOT doing all the things we need to do post-op and the resultant psych and physical problems is the actual cause. So NONCOMPLIANCE may be the cause, not the surgery itself. RnY gastric bypass people need to be aware of a condition known as “bariatric beriberi.” (Google it.) LOTS of problems due to thiamine deficiency.

•Again, not enough info here, but…IF you are in a position to get an attorney who can understand that bariatric surgeries can cause nutritional deficiencies that can, in turn, cause psychiatric issues…and that IF his situation is related to that issue…you might want to discuss conservatorship.

•MAYBE, if you are very good at intimidating people, you might find a way that you can cause his facility—to cover their asses—to run ALL the lab tests that might reveal any deficiencies and, if indicated, begin supplementation immediately.. Unfamiliarity with our need for nutritional supplementation will probably cause the facility to just add lots of psych drugs which won’t help at all.

•Finally, for now, his problems may be totally unrelated to his surgery. For example, his surgery was at age 24. Some issues, schizophrenia for one, has a usual onset age of 18-30. I’m just saying’.

Good luck.

Very good insight. Thank you, I needed to hear this. Very much appreciated.

 

[Spiky Bugger]

Very good insight. Thank you, I needed to hear this. Very much appreciated.

De nada.

 

[Larra]

Already some great advice, but I would add to reach out to his DS surgeon. He/she might have some experience with problems occurring many years post-op, esp in people who, as Spiky Bugger suggested, aren't properly attending to our needs for protein and specific vitamins. Even some people who start off great with this fall off after some years, when in reality it's a lifelong commitment. And, if your son has mental illness, regardless of the cause of that illness, he is less likely to be attentive to those needs. The surgeon may or may not be helpful, but you have nothing to lose by trying.

 

[DianaCox]

My $0.02:

Many bariatric surgeons do the surgery and then wish their patients well, and don't follow up to see how they're doing, much less pester them to follow up.

But the DS surgery in particular puts the patient at risk of nutritional deficiencies if the patient is not rigorous about periodic (at least yearly) testing all sorts of things on that list (it's about 14 tubes of blood), and rigorously supplementing with the right supplements. I'm 18 years out, and I'm taking quite a bit to keep my levels in range (Vitamins A, D, E, K1 and K2, all in so-called "dry" formulations [not in gel caps, because we can't absorb them]; tons of calcium citrate [not the Costco kind because it has too much B6], magnesium citrate, zinc, biotin, vitamin C, a prenatal multivitamin, and two kinds of probiotics). Multiple times/day. Plus, he's supposed to be eating at least 100 g of protein a day. It is an absolute requirement. I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that he hasn't been doing this.

But also, it's possible he has completely unrelated mental issues, or issues complicated by malnutrition. He needs to have both a physical and a psych workup.

I don't know where he is, but there are two DS surgeons in California who know and care very much about DS nutritional issues. Perhaps your son's doctors could have a telephone call with either Dr. John Rabkin in San Francisco, or Dr. Ara Keshishian in Pasadena.

 

[JackieOnLine]

I'm glad that I have a partner that I KNOW loves me for me and not my body.

OK, that is gold right there! I am happy for you.

I have had depression and binge eating disorder since before puberty (which started at 11), and anxiety since I was a young adult.

at 60 I am now trying to get back on my feet and it's not going well. the binge eating I had gotten under control TWICE and it came back with the pandemic.

life is just hard, let's face it.

Hello all, my son is 14 years out from DS surgery. He is 38 weighs 170lbs and is 6'5". He was 24 when he had the DS. He is at a bad place physically & mentally. I have no idea were to turn to and neither does he. I need help to fix him. He is lost and so am I. I am begging for help which is a very hard thing for me to do because I feel I am strong enough to get it fixed but not this time. Please please ant advise is appreciated. Kindly Sharon

I'm so sorry! you've gotten a lot of good advice in this thread and I hope some of it helps.



internet group hug for all of us who need it!