I got nearnuff dead but Im ok....NOW!

[DuodenalSwitchaRoo]

Todays pic...I really hate these pic lines....and have more than once in psychosis, tried to get all the stuff off.

I'm not posting so much for comfort as I am for a place to point people when people in 5 years tell me how great I look and how easy it must have been.

Dis no be easy....but at some point all the fuckery in my head should go back to previous levels.

 

[Bagaof4]

Poster Child for WLS patients told they took the "Easy Way Out!" So sorry for all you went through to get to this pic, but thanks for documenting the reality.
Hoping each day brings you closer to your old self mentally and your new self physically!!! You are one strong cookie!!

 

[Barb1]

@bearmom is right on the money. It was a total mind-fuck for 6 months or more for me too in 2010. It didn't happen quite as bad with Dr. K in September but I am warning anyone out there that have problems with getting protein and vitamins in that low protein and vitamin deficiency is a mind-fuck too! Do not think for one minute that it won't!

Barb
We are rooting for you Roo! You have a large cheering section!

 

[DuodenalSwitchaRoo]

i have also learned that I do not get on well with morphine, it makes my psychotic AND out to save the world from evils....aggressively. Also...the wall tiles give me messages lmao. I learned this a few days ago and haven't touched the stuff since. Good job I'm not in loads of pain! I had keyholes wounds from 1st surgery and then gapping 1ft one from second one. I'm now on wound vac, the best invention known to man.

I know Mr Patel isn't vetted per se, but I always thought the DS would kill me (it tried it's hardest!!!!!) but I knew my very best chance was with Mr P and his team. I am so happy I waited as I am still here to tell of it!

 

[Taterweight]

Yeah I didn't like the morphine either. Every time I turned around they were giving me a different pain med, it seemed, but I didn't really have much pain. I know you've been through a whole nother animal, but hopefully you have some good meds aside from the morphine. I wouldn't be to against the picc lines, my arms were beaten up by them redoing my iv lines...I was lucky they didn't go to my feet!

So what's your intake? I only wanted ice chips and iced tea the 5 day stay I had.

 

[DuodenalSwitchaRoo]

Ice chips water and tpn for the longest time. Still has a huge drunks cabinet.

 

[DianaCox]

Ask if you are on metoclopramide AKA Reglan. It is used to keep your guts moving, and I don't know why you would need it after a DS, but it is often given post-op. If they have you on it, ask them to discontinue! I had HORRIBLE psychiatric side effects from it, with NO underlying psych issues. http://www.askapatient.com/viewrating.asp?drug=17854&name=REGLAN

And I don't like morphine either - it doesn't work well, and it makes me itch.

 

[Elizabeth N.]

Oh yee gods and monsters, you're a morphine psycho? You poor baby, my heart goes out to you. ****HUGE HUGS*****

I hope that some weeks or months from now, you will be able to come back to these stories and celebrate.....well, your SURVIVAL, obviously, but also maybe find some sort of treasure trove of material for your next creative endeavors. I'm thinking really wild poetry, or even wilder stand-up comedy of some description.

There's an element as well of what a deep and powerful mind you have, to generate such, well, um, detailed and creative delusions *cue the special laughter reserved for gallows humor*. Damn, girl, this is going to be a DS story for the record books. I'm sorry you're going through a record-breaking experience.

 

[DuodenalSwitchaRoo]

The funny thing is....I STILL do NOT have buyers remorse. Not one second have I ever wished I hadn't done it. So I guess I was meant to be a life DSer

I didn't sleep at all last night. Really sleepy. And I just spend the 10 pence in energy I had on one of the best showers I've ever wanted. I was super slow to walk the 10 feet and sat on a bench, me and my tubes, and just enjoyed the water flowing everywhere. Im spent, but my hair is finally CLEAN!

Thank you guys for your support. I've worked out how to keep the panic at bay. At night, I need the nurses to keep my bay curtains closed so the only things in my view are my possessions. That seemed to work well last night.

I will get through this! And I ain't ever asked "why me?" cos really, why not me? And I have never second guessed it, even shitting on the commode, in pain, more tired than I have ever felt. No regrets.

And yes EN. Morphine Psycho, lol. I was CONVINCED I was changing the world.....but yeah, I googled that shit, and none of it ever happened lol

 

[shann]

Sounds like things are maybe getting a bit better? I remember that first shower -- it was heavenly!!

Still thinking and praying for you! <3 Hopefully the London fog will stay away

 

[BrianChesteen]

Praying that you continue to recover!

 

[MyNewLife]

So glad you are feeling better hun. Don't worry about not posting. I couldn't manage to focus to see for almost a week after surgery and you've gone through so much. Feel good"er"

 

[smokinstella]

So sorry you have had such a rough road dear. Just keep on healing and hopefully you can get home soon.

 

[hilary1617]

So glad you got a shower. HEAVENLY, right?! Hope you are feeling a bit better today. Best wishes!

 

[DuodenalSwitchaRoo]

Things are improving Got my drain out which has only ever has 25mil in it since Feb 18th. Got my wound redressed for the vac and it is growing so much healthy skin, the think I may be related a bit to wolverine, it is healing at twice as fast as they thought, still have a couple of weeks though.

Still have my PIC Line, which I loathe! Was due to get it out but instead they gave me sleeping pills and reinforced it....can't win them all, can ya? lol. The sleep was blissful, I hadn't slept properly since I woke up essentially.

Still going to be here a while yet. And my left hand is killing me!!!! Serious neuropathic damage happened in the 6 days asleep. I can feel every zap and zing of each nerve coming back to life and it really really hurts. Seriously hurts way worse than any part of my DSed body.

I finally off TPN, but still need anti-bs, and vits through the central line. Drinking loads and loads, sprinkling protein powder into my drinks.

Right now, meeting 100g isn't possible as they won't even let me eat mooshys.....(they did yesterday though so who knows?) So I'm just treating it as my dude to drink drink drink wee drink