Dad is finally moving in with us

[hilary1617]

Fantastic news!

 

[Larra]

I've been following along - so glad Dad made it safely to you. I remember meeting him back when you lived in SJ, and found him to be a very likable guy. I hope he'll have some good time with you, Charles, and the rest of the family.

 

[Munchkin]

It finally happened! Wish all of you the best!

 

[Sheanie]

All I can add at this point is just wait til you have him. She most obviously is frantically grasping for straws.

DOCUMENT how his mind declines, and her impatience. You already know the legal shit.

Personally, I would move my ass in with her if she pulls anything new. No one would stop me from taking my dad home. Certainly not someone who never cared enough to marry him.

 

[Sheanie]

Sorry. My phone only showed page 2. Congrats!!!!

 

[DianaCox]

Tonight at dinner he said he wasn’t interested in the RV trip and wanted to go back and stay with the GF instead. I pointed out that he just arrived yesterday and we are leaving on Wednesday. He seemed surprised. I told him he was going to have a good time and showed him something we were going to do and he dropped it. There are going to be times this isn’t going to be easy.

 

[Webmommy]

I hope he has a great time!

 

[MsVee]

I am so glad he arrived. I know how important it is for you to provide quality care for your Father.

 

[hilary1617]

Tonight at dinner he said he wasn’t interested in the RV trip and wanted to go back and stay with the GF instead. I pointed out that he just arrived yesterday and we are leaving on Wednesday. He seemed surprised. I told him he was going to have a good time and showed him something we were going to do and he dropped it. There are going to be times this isn’t going to be easy.

It'll get better over time, once he sees how pleasant and comfortable the new surrounds are. It may be useful to try to establish some special connection points (e.g. share a cup coffee/tea/together outside while viewing the sunset or take a morning walk) that can become part of a daily routine that can be maintained whether home or on the road to ease the transition. It will probably take a month or so for him to feel settled.

 

[JackieOnLine]

Tonight at dinner he said he wasn’t interested in the RV trip and wanted to go back and stay with the GF instead. I pointed out that he just arrived yesterday and we are leaving on Wednesday. He seemed surprised. I told him he was going to have a good time and showed him something we were going to do and he dropped it. There are going to be times this isn’t going to be easy.

there will be, but that would be true even if he didn't have dementia.

sounds like you said exactly the right thing and know the basics - never argue, but talk about positive things and re-direct.

I am so glad for both of you as he finally he gets the care and respect he deserves!

 

[Larra]

Great advice from hilary1617 . He may benefit from having a routine that he can get used to and count on. And from his point of view, any time spent with you is quality time, no matter what you are doing, even if from your point of view you aren't doing anything.

 

[Munchkin]

It is easier for them to minimize their dementia and appear more 'normal' doing familiar things with familiar people. Any change is difficult.