Clematis
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Sep 5, 2015
- Messages
- 1,705
My one year surgiversary was yesterday. I feel like I should have a pithy and profound statement but all I can say is that I simply feel normal. And after nearly 40 years of not feeling normal, I guess that says a lot.
And indeed I look normal. No one would ever suspect I had been MO (unless they saw me naked). When I tell people who didn't know me “before" that I used to be “quite heavy” without exception they laugh as if I’m making a joke. (I have never told anyone I had WLS, besides my husband and medical personnel and then only if I feel it is pertinent to their area of expertise.) Even I can barely remember myself obese.
I’ve lost more than 100# and fluctuate in the low 130s. At 5’5”, that’s ok with me. Two weeks ago after a month of barely being able to eat the food given me on vacation and then landing in the ER with yet another kidney stone and a week of dehydrating vomiting and diarrhea, I dropped to just under 125# — too thin for me when one considers that I guess I have 8-10# of excess skin. Two weeks of eating normally and my weight is back to 133 today, even after surgery to remove the kidney stone on Wednesday. In hindsight, I’m a little concerned about how quickly I lost when sick. At my age I will have to watch that when I get sick in the future. (Ha. Pre-DS I used to GAIN weight when sick from sitting around the house near the kitchen.) I wear a size 4 in pants, down from the biggest 18W stretch pants I could find and I’d quickly wear through the inner thighs. (Some size 4 pants are too big!) I wear a medium ladies shirt because my arms are exceptionally long and I don’t like shirts snug around my baggy tummy skin — I was wearing a men’s XXL. I still have episodes of body dysmorphia. Some days I’ll see my reflection in a store window and think I look chubby but then remember I’m wearing a freakin’ size 4 and smile.
My unmanageable high cholesterol just vanished by the 3rd month post op. My blood pressure dropped but is still a tad high -- not high enough to treat. I feel great. One year labs will be drawn Tuesday.
I have really struggled with keeping down dense protein and some breads. Fish and moist hamburger are frequently safe in small amounts of under 2 ounces. I can (sometimes) eat part of a juicy chicken thigh but no other types of chicken. (Chik-fil-A nuggets are the WORST — two and I’m ready to puke. Give me the unnatural chopped and formed nuggets which are easily broken down.) I’ve yet to be able to eat an entire egg in any form. After a year of vomiting it’s sort of been aversion therapy as I no longer have any desire for protein foods. Not good. I have to force myself. So bizarre as I lived on a protein-heavy Atkins diet for most of the past two decades. This has gotten much better in the past 2 months, but still not comfortable. Although I rarely vomit any more, my sleeve still aches after a few bites of protein and then I can't eat anything else. Yes, I eat carbs. If I didn't, I would have starved to death months ago.
My hair is very thin. Just when I think the loss has stopped, I’ll get out of the shower, like today, and fistfuls are in the comb. Concurrently, my hair is growing back in areas where it started falling out 3.5 months after surgery, but all these various lengths on my overall shoulder-length hair make it look even more wispy and unruly. I’m sure it will eventually correct itself. Well pretty sure. Gulp.
I look pretty good in clothes. Naked, I look like a melted candle. The skin on my upper arms and inner thighs drapes like a theatre curtain. However bad my legs look standing, they’re positively dreadful with my knees up as in sitting or climbing stairs when the skin hangs and sways. It’s like marshmallow fluff. I will never be able to wear sleeveless shirts or shorts, or even a skirt without tights or pantyhose. Breasts looking like rocks in socks doesn't apply to me as I don’t even have the rocks. There is serious plastics in my future.
In weird news: I can no longer shave my armpits. My armpit is now a deep crevasse, inaccessible to a razor. I can bury my fingers in my armpit to the PIP joint and no amount of twisting and tugging flattens it out enough to shave. I have to plan 10 minutes before a shower to apply Nair which is annoying. I even have to turn the deodorant sideways to get in deep.
But I’m not complaining. I really do think the DS a miracle gift and am so very thankful. I wish I would have done this a decade or two ago!
And indeed I look normal. No one would ever suspect I had been MO (unless they saw me naked). When I tell people who didn't know me “before" that I used to be “quite heavy” without exception they laugh as if I’m making a joke. (I have never told anyone I had WLS, besides my husband and medical personnel and then only if I feel it is pertinent to their area of expertise.) Even I can barely remember myself obese.
I’ve lost more than 100# and fluctuate in the low 130s. At 5’5”, that’s ok with me. Two weeks ago after a month of barely being able to eat the food given me on vacation and then landing in the ER with yet another kidney stone and a week of dehydrating vomiting and diarrhea, I dropped to just under 125# — too thin for me when one considers that I guess I have 8-10# of excess skin. Two weeks of eating normally and my weight is back to 133 today, even after surgery to remove the kidney stone on Wednesday. In hindsight, I’m a little concerned about how quickly I lost when sick. At my age I will have to watch that when I get sick in the future. (Ha. Pre-DS I used to GAIN weight when sick from sitting around the house near the kitchen.) I wear a size 4 in pants, down from the biggest 18W stretch pants I could find and I’d quickly wear through the inner thighs. (Some size 4 pants are too big!) I wear a medium ladies shirt because my arms are exceptionally long and I don’t like shirts snug around my baggy tummy skin — I was wearing a men’s XXL. I still have episodes of body dysmorphia. Some days I’ll see my reflection in a store window and think I look chubby but then remember I’m wearing a freakin’ size 4 and smile.
My unmanageable high cholesterol just vanished by the 3rd month post op. My blood pressure dropped but is still a tad high -- not high enough to treat. I feel great. One year labs will be drawn Tuesday.
I have really struggled with keeping down dense protein and some breads. Fish and moist hamburger are frequently safe in small amounts of under 2 ounces. I can (sometimes) eat part of a juicy chicken thigh but no other types of chicken. (Chik-fil-A nuggets are the WORST — two and I’m ready to puke. Give me the unnatural chopped and formed nuggets which are easily broken down.) I’ve yet to be able to eat an entire egg in any form. After a year of vomiting it’s sort of been aversion therapy as I no longer have any desire for protein foods. Not good. I have to force myself. So bizarre as I lived on a protein-heavy Atkins diet for most of the past two decades. This has gotten much better in the past 2 months, but still not comfortable. Although I rarely vomit any more, my sleeve still aches after a few bites of protein and then I can't eat anything else. Yes, I eat carbs. If I didn't, I would have starved to death months ago.
My hair is very thin. Just when I think the loss has stopped, I’ll get out of the shower, like today, and fistfuls are in the comb. Concurrently, my hair is growing back in areas where it started falling out 3.5 months after surgery, but all these various lengths on my overall shoulder-length hair make it look even more wispy and unruly. I’m sure it will eventually correct itself. Well pretty sure. Gulp.
I look pretty good in clothes. Naked, I look like a melted candle. The skin on my upper arms and inner thighs drapes like a theatre curtain. However bad my legs look standing, they’re positively dreadful with my knees up as in sitting or climbing stairs when the skin hangs and sways. It’s like marshmallow fluff. I will never be able to wear sleeveless shirts or shorts, or even a skirt without tights or pantyhose. Breasts looking like rocks in socks doesn't apply to me as I don’t even have the rocks. There is serious plastics in my future.
In weird news: I can no longer shave my armpits. My armpit is now a deep crevasse, inaccessible to a razor. I can bury my fingers in my armpit to the PIP joint and no amount of twisting and tugging flattens it out enough to shave. I have to plan 10 minutes before a shower to apply Nair which is annoying. I even have to turn the deodorant sideways to get in deep.
But I’m not complaining. I really do think the DS a miracle gift and am so very thankful. I wish I would have done this a decade or two ago!
Sorry for the protein struggle - keep up the effort. A healthy you is well worth it! Also, sorry to hear about the kidney stone and illness. Feel better soon!
