New to group but struggling

[Mfaulk4506]

Hi my name is Michelle, I had gastric sleeve surgery Febuary 23rd. I have had great success but I am struggling getting down my protien and staying away from the carby sugary stuff. Today was the worse. Me and my husband were out with my brother for dinner and then my brother decides we are going to go to dairy queen. Of course I was like ill just get a mini and eat a few bites. Noooo I go and eat the whole mini. Then my brother and my husband start getting on to me about me not eating enough protien and me eating that mini blizzard. I felt like I was loosing this battle. I understand where there coming from but when I try to tell them it seems that protien hurts my stomach and those carby and sugary things don't they think I'm crazy and it's all in my head. I am at a point where I don't know what to do. I just had my 6mnth follow up with the surgeon and I explained to her my symptoms and told her I mainly get my protien from protien shakes. She told me to try to stop the protien shakes and eat more protien. I told her what happens when I eat the protien and she said we'll we can do an endoscopy and see if there's anything going on but she doesn't think there is. She then proceeded to tell me that from her experience gastric sleeve patients struggle more then gastric bypass patients. If anyone has any help or ways to get through this please let me know. Also I haven't stopped loosing weight. I am down 160 pounds since the 9th of September, so I must be doing something right but I do not want to start gaining and I want to be successful. Thanks again for any advice.

 

[southernlady]

Welcome @Mfaulk4506
Let us know how your endoscopy turns out. It may not be all in your head. BTW, the sleeve has a high failure rate. We have a very successful sleever here, @JackieOnLine but she works very hard at it.

Whatever you do, please do NOT let them turn your sleeve into a RNY. Get either a DS or a SADI, preferably a DS. You want to keep your pyloric valve in play.

 

[BigIsland Tammy]

Hi my name is Michelle, I had gastric sleeve surgery Febuary 23rd. I have had great success but I am struggling getting down my protien and staying away from the carby sugary stuff. Today was the worse. Me and my husband were out with my brother for dinner and then my brother decides we are going to go to dairy queen. Of course I was like I’ll just get a mini and eat a few bites. Noooo I go and eat the whole mini. Then my brother and my husband start getting on to me about me not eating enough protien and me eating that mini blizzard. I felt like I was loosing this battle. I understand where there coming from but when I try to tell them it seems that protien hurts my stomach and those carby and sugary things don't they think I'm crazy and it's all in my head. I am at a point where I don't know what to do. I just had my 6mnth follow up with the surgeon and I explained to her my symptoms and told her I mainly get my protien from protien shakes. She told me to try to stop the protien shakes and eat more protien. I told her what happens when I eat the protien and she said we'll we can do an endoscopy and see if there's anything going on but she doesn't think there is. She then proceeded to tell me that from her experience gastric sleeve patients struggle more then gastric bypass patients. If anyone has any help or ways to get through this please let me know. Also I haven't stopped loosing weight. I am down 160 pounds since the 9th of September, so I must be doing something right but I do not want to start gaining and I want to be successful. Thanks again for any advice.

For a while I could only eat softer or fatty proteins. Ground turkey, dark chicken, eggs. With only a sleeve I’m sure you have to watch your fat content more than I did, but getting your protein intake up is important.

 

[Mfaulk4506]

Welcome @Mfaulk4506
Let us know how your endoscopy turns out. It may not be all in your head. BTW, the sleeve has a high failure rate. We have a very successful sleever here, @JackieOnLine but she works very hard at it.

Whatever you do, please do NOT let them turn your sleeve into a RNY. Get either a DS or a SADI, preferably a DS. You want to keep your pyloric valve in play.

Yeah I'm hoping I won't have to have a revision surgery. I am hopeful that I will loose enough weight with the sleeve. Do you know why the sleeve has such a high failure rate? I'm willing to work hard on the intake of what I eat but unfortunately with all my other physical problems I can not exercise like I should. Unfortunately I do not have access to a pool either. We have very limited income due to me and my husband both being on disability.

 

[Larra]

The sleeve works by giving you restriction, so you eat less and lose weight. The restriction gradually lessens as time goes on, so while you have this benefit, it's crucial to develop the right diet so you don't regain the weight you have worked so hard to lose.
It's unfortunate that you aren't able to exercise, but that's really not the key to maintaining your weight loss. The amount of calories you could burn with exercise is easily countered by one helping of high calorie food. Sure, exercise would help but it's really the food restriction that creates the weight loss.
Depending on the nature of your disability, it might be possible to do at least some form of exercise, such as sit and be fit, or some other program that could be tailored to your abilities. Again, it's not going to keep the weight off, but it can be beneficial to your health in other ways.

 

[southernlady]

Yeah I'm hoping I won't have to have a revision surgery. I am hopeful that I will loose enough weight with the sleeve. Do you know why the sleeve has such a high failure rate? I'm willing to work hard on the intake of what I eat but unfortunately with all my other physical problems I can not exercise like I should. Unfortunately I do not have access to a pool either. We have very limited income due to me and my husband both being on disability.

The sleeve is given to many people who need more than just restriction. I would ask @JackieOnLine for tips on how she’s done so well.

 

[JackieOnLine]

Then my brother and my husband start getting on to me about me not eating enough protien and me eating that mini blizzard. I felt like I was loosing this battle. I understand where there coming from but when I try to tell them it seems that protien hurts my stomach and those carby and sugary things don't they think I'm crazy and it's all in my head.

I don't know much abut you, but I know this for sure:

even if you had not just had a major surgery, why in hell would your husband, let alone your brother, feel like they can tell you what or how to eat? EVER? that is just not OK.

going forward you will need to find/figure out a new relationship with food and with eating that works for you. you will have to treat yourself with love and respect so you can insist that family do the same.

those here who had a DS had a messed up metabolism and that is why they were obese. I never had that: I got fat and then obese by yo-yo dieting and binge eating. so the answer is in my behavior and my mind. I have done talk therapy but honestly have had much more help from what I have learned on my own.

by the way, it's totally normal that SUGAR and unhealthy foods are easier to eat so no wonder it's what you want. but they are unhealthy. if healthy food is not working for you, eat less and maybe MUCH less of it. maybe NONE of it until your stomach is ready.

I ate very little that wasn't liquid for months and months after my surgery because I couldn't handle much. you have to go slow and pay attention to how it feels. and I ignored anyone who thought I shouldn't eat protein drinks. (mine weren't shakes because I made them with water not milk)

restriction is temporary, your thoughts and behaviors and habits have to change long term and it needs to be about your health, not your size. and you have to learn what you need so you can trust yourself and, frankly, stand up for yourself.

some people (your doctor, apparently) have strong feelings that protein via shakes is BAD and "real" food is what you need. well, how would they know? if you can tolerate solids, fine, but it sounds like protein shakes work better. go with what feels better!

honestly, you need to be surrounded by people who treat you with respect and I don't know how to advise you to find that. online isn't enough, you need in person support. do you have friends or a therapist?

I'm sorry this is happening and wish is was as simple as, you had surgery and now you just enjoy the ride down. that part can be fun and you should get to enjoy it.

But long term it won't be enough without behavioral changes and changes in RELATIONSHIPS. so, your relationship with yourself, with food, with eating and with your family.

lots of work, but worth it.

I am still a work in progress!

meanwhile, I strongly suggest you don't eat out with your family until you are comfortable with a new way to eat. not if they can't be more supportive that what you have described!

 

[JackieOnLine]

I try to tell them it seems that protien hurts my stomach

even at 6 months, you aren't very far out. can you be more specific about what happens? what protein are you trying to eat and how?

it's hard to think back but I was on clear liquids for 10 days following surgery and full liquids for another 10 days BUT I really was mostly on liquids for months and months and would experiment with a bite of this or that.

you should stop eating any food or amount that is painful. if you only have liquids are you fine? can you take small bites without discomfort?

the more we understand what is happening the better advice we can give.

 

[Mfaulk4506]

I eat very small pieces and chew then very well. It's chicken, canned tuna , some seafood. It tends to have a pressure feeling and discomfort. Then usually followed by pain in the area where my stomach is. Sometimes I also get very nauseated. I then just stop and take some anti nauseous meds and give up on eating. I then just start sipping at a protien drink after about an hour and get in my protien that way. But like I said before it doesn't happen with like the carby and sugary stuff. Which to me is really weird. Also I only generally get down a bite or two before this happens.

 

[southernlady]

Chicken is a hard meat for most of us unless it’s drowning in butter or sauces. I find pork and 80/20 beef and a good well marbled steak much easier to deal with.

 

[JackieOnLine]

I eat very small pieces and chew then very well. It's chicken, canned tuna , some seafood. It tends to have a pressure feeling and discomfort.

you need to start from somewhere there is NO discomfort. only liquids. or liquids with ONE bite of maybe scrambled eggs or something else that is moist.

take ONE thing at a time - ONE bite at a time. if no discomfort at all, take a second bite. if any discomfort STOP and wait until the next time you are hungry. if a second bite is OK, take a third.

the goal is no discomfort at all, add one bite that also cause no discomfort at all. then add a second bite, you see? I really think you need to be doing this alone, not in company and not in public, until you figure out what works.


very, very slow and one thing at time. so you stop before there is any pain. even "discomfort" may mean you went too far. one or two bites is fine, get over the idea that you need a certain amount. People often have a subtle sign they are "done" after one bite or however many, like a hiccup or a yawn. something that happens before there is any discomfort.

as long as you are well hydrated, you're fine. and if tolerate liquid protein, that's fine too. you don't need to have solid food so you take it as slowly as you have to, no matter what other people tell you or think you should be doing.

remember what your stomach as been through and assume it is STILL swollen and tender. treat it very, very gently and it will tell you what you can eat.

you don't need the carby stuff, you really don't.


also, since you have already lost a lot of weight, I will tell you that to your own eyes and the eyes of others, at some point it's going to seem like "that's enough! it's unhealthy to get too thin, stop losing weight"!!!!

but you know what? you are fine and what looks normal/healthy is going to change over time. things also shift on your body (like many of tend to lose "top down" so your face seems too skinny first of all)

so focus on how your pants fit and on how you feel. really, really pay attention to how you feel. especially when eating.

eat without the distraction of other people or TV or anything, or else you are almost certainly going too fast.

 

[JackieOnLine]

also, since you said you are willing to "work hard" let's keep in mind that you are used to suffering to lose weight.

but you don't have to: it's coming off easily now and that will continue. not forever, but for awhile. so ANY discomfort is unnecessary.

the hardest stuff to work on and the thing that will make it work in the long run is the emotional stuff.

keep posting!