bearmom
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Jan 6, 2014
- Messages
- 977
I'll apologize for the crappy surgiverserey post right now. I considered not posting an update, as so many things in life have been hard the last few years, and I didn't want to post a huge bummery thing. I'm posting it anyway, because I realized how truly nightmarish the last four years would have been with the disability of morbid obesity holding me down. I’m cross posting this on several boards that I visit.
Today is the 6th anniversary of my DS, and it has been life changing. Other surgery anniversaries I've been over the moon with my new ability to ski or wake-board, and I still do those things, but real life happens with lots of unfun things, and being physically capable has proven invaluable to me.
I've had some real highs and lows and the last 4 years have been progressively trying, culminating in the death of my father a few months ago. I’m going to mention it because my DS was such a blessing during that. He was diagnosed with stage 4 renal cancer, and while declining quickly, wanted to stay in the home he built, with his wife of 65 years as long as he could. This could only happen if me and another sibling could take on the job of 24/7 caretakers, who could do everything he would need.
He was a large man, who became less able by the day, and was completely dependent on us at at the end. Anyone who has worked in healthcare can tell you this is not work for the wimpy. Had I not had the DS, I could not have helped him when he was bedridden, or even before as I had to be able to support / balance his weight to get to wherever we were going. So with some training, the one last thing he wanted I was able to do with just myself and my siblings, without having to have strangers come into their house on a daily basis, and help with what were often embarrassing things for him. Death is a bummer, but being able to keep him comfortable in his own home with his family until the end was important, and I was able to make it happen. This would not have been the case 6 years ago. Little things like that take tiny bites out of the grief.
On the happier side, our wedding plans that we had to cancel to take some time to help my parents, were only delayed and we plan to go overseas to marry this spring (this has absolutely been been our bright spot to look towards after many events of the last two years and is all that has kept us going some days). With some time back in our schedule we are getting back to skiing (when the snow cooperates) and some of the stuff I’d been hiring out like roofing or painting -I’m a real estate investor, so lots of crappy fixit type jobs- I am doing myself because I CAN, and it definitely saves me money. Climbing ladders or squeezing into crawl spaces isn't so intimidating when you are small.
So I have had more life events that have been daunting over the last few years, but honestly, dealing with stuff, being able to just focus on what you must, without having the added ball and chain of morbid obesity that factors into everything? It makes all the difference. I take my small size for granted and tend to forget more and more how hard things used to be, so this surgiversary is a good time to remember and just revel in how good plain old normal feels.
Today is the 6th anniversary of my DS, and it has been life changing. Other surgery anniversaries I've been over the moon with my new ability to ski or wake-board, and I still do those things, but real life happens with lots of unfun things, and being physically capable has proven invaluable to me.
I've had some real highs and lows and the last 4 years have been progressively trying, culminating in the death of my father a few months ago. I’m going to mention it because my DS was such a blessing during that. He was diagnosed with stage 4 renal cancer, and while declining quickly, wanted to stay in the home he built, with his wife of 65 years as long as he could. This could only happen if me and another sibling could take on the job of 24/7 caretakers, who could do everything he would need.
He was a large man, who became less able by the day, and was completely dependent on us at at the end. Anyone who has worked in healthcare can tell you this is not work for the wimpy. Had I not had the DS, I could not have helped him when he was bedridden, or even before as I had to be able to support / balance his weight to get to wherever we were going. So with some training, the one last thing he wanted I was able to do with just myself and my siblings, without having to have strangers come into their house on a daily basis, and help with what were often embarrassing things for him. Death is a bummer, but being able to keep him comfortable in his own home with his family until the end was important, and I was able to make it happen. This would not have been the case 6 years ago. Little things like that take tiny bites out of the grief.
On the happier side, our wedding plans that we had to cancel to take some time to help my parents, were only delayed and we plan to go overseas to marry this spring (this has absolutely been been our bright spot to look towards after many events of the last two years and is all that has kept us going some days). With some time back in our schedule we are getting back to skiing (when the snow cooperates) and some of the stuff I’d been hiring out like roofing or painting -I’m a real estate investor, so lots of crappy fixit type jobs- I am doing myself because I CAN, and it definitely saves me money. Climbing ladders or squeezing into crawl spaces isn't so intimidating when you are small.
So I have had more life events that have been daunting over the last few years, but honestly, dealing with stuff, being able to just focus on what you must, without having the added ball and chain of morbid obesity that factors into everything? It makes all the difference. I take my small size for granted and tend to forget more and more how hard things used to be, so this surgiversary is a good time to remember and just revel in how good plain old normal feels.
