15 year WLS veteran with an opinion to those considering WLS.

[more2adore]

@veteranDS I would appreciate it if you would read the post I just took time out of my life to write for you on the VSG vs. DS thread in its entirety. Frankly, it's way more personal info than you deserve, but sometimes the only way people "get" why their way of thinking is wrong is to get down to that level of nitty gritty.

@DianaCox and @Larra and @Elizabeth N. and everybody else - thank you so much for the overprotectiveness. You guys are the best. I may not be quite as "vulnerable" as Diana worries I am, but it sure made me smile. *group hug icon I can't find. *

 

[DianaCox]

Sigh, one last time, and then I'm done.

You said in your original post - edited to focus on the most egregious statements:

"What's wrong in your life? Debt? Bad marriage? Unresolved trauma? These will all be left after the surgery and any weight loss. ... When you free your mind and live life to its full potential, good food choices and constant movement are a no brainer. These last two are essentials,"​

You are suggesting that our weight is the result of bad food choices and slothfulness which are a direct result of trauma in our lives. THIS IS SIMPLY UNTRUE for the vast majority of us.

"WLS or not, it will always be calories in and calories out." ​

This was already discussed with you - you are just plain WRONG. And to the extent this was directed to More2Adore and all the rest of us who KNOW that our metabolisms were maladaptively efficient, a just plain INSULT, suggesting we are lying to ourselves about our intake and output (and I know that you are telling yourself right now that although you are clearly going to have to bite your tongue about it here, you KNOW we're wrong, lying and/or in denial - amiright?).

Yes, I'd do it again in a hot second, but I'd start fixing me before I had the surgery. ... If your focus is on anything else prior to surgery, IMHO, is a mistake......and no if you fix yourself, you won't be denied the surgery, unless of course you fix you so good, you lose it on your own!!! ... LOL....the short version is to spend more time with your therapist, than you surgeons. ​

Here again, the misapplied broad brush. (1) We ALL need to have our heads shrunk, because we're all fat because of trauma; and (2) if you fix yourself, you might not need surgery!! That is a complete load of CRAP.

I expect those in deep denial to passionately disagree with me. ​

And this was just ad hominem as previously discussed.

I know there are exceptions, but the numbers are to small to calculate, and those people are not on message boards looking for answers."​

And this is just farcically false, but expressly suggests that those of us who don't admit to traumatic psychiatric abuses as the cause of our morbid obesity, we're all liars, and none of the TRULY medically ill are posting on message boards.

You owe apologies, and you should do the other things that were suggested to you.

 

[more2adore]

Oh, and PS - re logging and honesty: My MFP is set to "zero activity/sedentary." So there's no way I'm overestimating my activity levels, since, you know, I'm claiming none. In fact, given all the walking I do around the city for various errands and the, uh, vigorous activity I regularly undertake as a newlywed (you're welcome for that image), I am actually probably vastly UNDERreporting my activity levels. Also, no one sees my MFP log but me, so I have no one to lie to/for. It gets every little thing I put in my mouth listed in it, good or bad (and that's why I set the food diary to private... so I wouldn't worry about what other people saw, but would be completely honest). Ask my hubby - I'm driving him insane insisting he weigh things when he cooks or is sweet and brings me something. A conversation we had last night? "Can you make sure you weigh the strawberry slices you put on that chocolate souffle?" Yes, I am a giant pain in the ass. Yes, I am being anal-retentive about logging. But yes, you can bet your ass my logs are accurate. 2000-2500 calories a day (sometimes less). Even with zero activity, at 510+ pounds I should be losing. I am not, and I am more active than I claim. Your assumptions are ridiculous.

 

[star0210]

I'm all about second chances. Hell, I married my first husband twice. But I've also learned MY lesson from that experience - "Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me."

So I'm not the only one who did that....HA!

 

[southernlady]

Okay, I believe she gets it so *I* am closing this thread to further replies.