VSG long term

[JackieOnLine]

I read my previous posts here and I see I was only 10 pounds over goal last time I talked about it. last I looked I was 22 pounds up so that's different & not in a fun way. I didn't "give in to hunger" or cut back from exercising 3 hours a day to 1 or anything, I put it on with sweets and binge eating.

so, with me it's all about the mind games and mental stuff EN was posting about. I know I look at myself in the mirror and I feel exactly as fat as I did when I weighed 80 pounds more.

the good news is if I can when I deal with the head stuff I can go back to eating moderate amounts of whatever I want and be happy with whatever size that means. this has always been my plan and my goal and I was doing it for long enough I believe it wasn't (just!) the honeymoon. OK, the first 3 1/2 years was.

so - long term - how much "work" you are willing to do to maintain and how you decide where that maintaining needs to keep you is going to vary. WLS people like normies are sometimes going to obsess and go on crash diets which is different from keeping track, being mindful, or whatever works for you.

honest to goodness if I could just get the rest of my life back On Track and then went back to eating when I was hungry, everything would be good. if I was a size 8 or 10 or 6 or 12 - it's all good! I just want to be happy and healthy and not nuts!

I wish there were more VSGers - especially long term - here to talk to. I did go elsewhere again but ...well, I'm spoiled by this excellent software and really hate posting on creaky old boards. (n)

@Jo777 - I'm going to read everything you've posted here but - come back! talk to me!! you have done so well: it's pretty much controlling the carbs for you, do I have that right? and how do we get more peeps?

head games!

 

[Spiky Bugger]

I haven't seen my sister in a few months, but my daughter tells me it looks as though she's put on a few pounds. I think her two year vsg anniversary is in October. And doesn't Pumpkin now have the sleeve? We need to get her back online here.

 

[brooklyngirl]

My sister is still in "honeymoon" and is struggling to get off anymore weight. She's constantly obsessing over it, feeling like she's still on one diet after another as she tries different things to try to get the weight moving more, and while she'll never say it or make me feel bad, I know the thought of me being the smaller one freaks her out. I've always been either bigger or MUCH bigger and I'm almost her size now. Most of the hand me downs she just gave me are too big. I dunno if that's really relevant to what you're original post is about, but it's VSG struggle stuff, and there really are too few of you guys here! I tried to lure ppl on Instagram a few months ago but felt like I was being a creepster

 

[JackieOnLine]

I haven't seen my sister in a few months, but my daughter tells me it looks as though she's put on a few pounds. I think her two year vsg anniversary is in October. And doesn't Pumpkin now have the sleeve? We need to get her back online here.

yes, we do need Pumpkin here - I assumed you were on top of this *stern face*

see, I couldn't have gained weight in the first two years no matter what. not if you'd offered me a million dollars, I mean it.

My sister is still in "honeymoon" and is struggling to get off anymore weight.

if I thought this would have been me, I'd have go for a DS I think - and that is what I would recommend to people if they think this would be them. life is hard enough without additional struggle, IMO.

now, I know I am unusual - I was a light weight and I still have a normal metabolism...if normal is the right word. I mean, I have had to eat a lot to gain this weight!

that's the thing, though - not everybody needs a DS but some people sure do. I think if you really need to work hard, yes, you probably will need a DS eventually.

and for those of us who don't, well I try not to judge those who seem to really obsess about staying a size whatever rather than relaxing about it.

that's why I am so glad Jo is around (although not just lately which is why I tagged her in my OP) - she seems to have a nice, healthy way about her where she sometimes has an issue - not perfect, in other words - but generally healthy. and none of this crash diet crap.

 

[bearmom]

Well, my sleeve is part of the DS, but that doesn't save me from the carbs and sweets. I don't even get the gas/poo repercussions to discourage me, so I've been bingeing right along with you.

I have no excuse. I have more garden produce than I've had in years. Lettuce has gone bad in the fridge while I've had numerous meals of cake. There is always and excuse like stress or pms or the stars areen't aligned for me to have a few extra, but I know it's because I'm being careless.

My goal right now is to just eat better, and STILL not get out the scale. I don't want to make it about the number, but I'm not sure if I can.

 

[JackieOnLine]

I "liked" your post because I was thinking YES just like ME. so, sorry you are going through this but I'm glad I'm not alone.

Lettuce has gone bad in the fridge while I've had numerous meals of cake. There is always and excuse like stress or pms or the stars areen't aligned

yep, I go to the farmer's market and get organic, local produce and then I fill up on donuts and other crap.

but the stars AREN'T aligned, I'm going to eat better as soon as....gah!

D, you need to post here more often. dunno if it will help you but it might help ME.

 

[Jo777]

Hey Jackie! I will post a bit more later when I'm not totally beat.. Trust me, I'd like to get down a good 10-15, and like you- I know where it comes from and where it will go if I let it. If I have my head on straight, no issues.. otherwise, yep- the eating when not hungry, sweets/carbs and recently, alcohol.. is the cause of the extra that is making me feel like I was back to 264 again. It's totally all the head-stuff. If I ate normally, 4x or so a day, I'd have no issue. Dealing with a painful arm, which is effecting my livelyhood not to mention home-life is getting me down.. I'll be back, but it's bedtime for me

 

[bearmom]

I always think I'll post more, but then I come here and don't see other new stuff, or if I do see something I want to hop in on, I think "well, I don't have time to post all that right now, I'll come back". But after a few days, I've forgotten anything I ever meant to do.

I would say I came to post tonight to be accountable, but the truth is I already ate that blueberry scone AND home made ice cream, so it's too late to save me from my rotten behavior today. I'll instead look up new pickling recipes and research what the weird round yellow thing is that came with the veggies tonight. Best guess so far is lemon cuke.

 

[JackieOnLine]

Jo, you are also struggling? this hits me kind of hard, I'm afraid you're going to have to work on that. you know, for my sake!

what happened with your arm? I should know from FB but I don't.

what the weird round yellow thing is that came with the veggies tonight. Best guess so far is lemon cuke

I have small round cukes from the farmer's market - I keep thinking they are apples. they taste just like cucumbers.

 

[Jo777]

Jo, you are also struggling? this hits me kind of hard, I'm afraid you're going to have to work on that. you know, for my sake!

what happened with your arm? I should know from FB but I don't.

Yep, I know I need to get my butt in gear and back to healthier outlets (for both our sakes!! )

The extra 15 I'm up over this last 9mo or so I can almost totally pin on beer, wine and booze, along with the tag-along not-so-smart food choices. I've courted psychological dependence on it, as I've used it far more often for stress relief/pain relief rather than plain 'ol yippee times. I used to just have a beverage(s) for fun once in a while, or when out.. or when playing mixologist in the kitchen on fun nights w/ Todd.. it's devolved and needs to go back to it's normal place in my life again. It's not healthy behavior, and I'm not 20-something either. FMR, when I was, I was 100lbs heavier.. It's still fixable, and I'm aware of it- and where it came from (see below) which for me is a big deal.. Also knowing where it's going to go if left unchecked.. I'm at that red line of needing to get on the ball, very soon (meaning cutting out the food/alcohol escapism shit and re-learning some stress-dealing skills a normal person, like I used to do..) For me, it's totally head stuff.

I had a very difficult winter with my moods, got on a med a few months ago which seems to help a little, but my anxiety issues are still not under control (and I'm not keen on more or different meds.. as I still have hope I can tackle this myself..???) I'm sure my lifestyle isn't helping these issues, hello depressant chemical cocktails.. The arm thing started in winter as well- turns out to be radial tunnel and tendinosis. I've done the steroids and electrically administered steroids, and that really helped knock it back to a bearable pain level (also left me with nice pitted scars on my forearm- I don't care about the scars, but it was just another thing to get pissy over when they took forever to heal- hydrogen burns suck) BUT I'm still doing the same job that got me there, modifying it as best possible when I can. Add that all the other normal day-to-day life problems.. The topper: my mom has had a couple small strokes, has beginning dementia, and I fully think my father is actively not pursuing help when obviously needed in hopes that she may just pass.. not calling the ambulance, not going to the ER.. and they just recently got rear-ended, totaled the car and put any gains in mobility she achieved back to square one. She's popping valium, and drinking a couple rum & cokes at night.. which is something my parents, much less mom, never did.. they were not drinkers at all. Todd & I just confronted them about their long-term plans last weekend.. as they refused to talk about it realistically, and things needed to be said, and they were. My mom was grey.

It's just been a weird fucked up year, and I've not been a happy camper for most of it.

On the food-front- I still don't keep bread/pasta/sweets IN the house save for some rice noodles for soup, but if out.. I don't say no like I used to nearly as often. I've fallen face first into numbing depression with food several times. I honestly feel like there is room for these things in my life, but I have slipped into unhealthy escapism for far longer, and deeper than I ever have before, instead of taking a step back. When I'm on track, I eat well.. I need to start thinking well too, to get the rest of me back to where I'm comfortable.

Wow, I really hate that I sound like a whiny-ass victim here. I'm NOT. I'm just a stressed out monkey that needs to actually work on fixing me.. DO it and not just THINK about doing it. Grrr.

 

[JackieOnLine]

that is a buttload of trouble - so your Mom & Dad are local? any other siblings to help out?

My mom was grey.

literally?! as in, not enough O2?

my first thought (oh, how I LOVE fixing other people's problems instead of working on my own) is don't be so damn hard on yourself!! shame and blame hasn't helped any of us.

it is also totally head stuff for me. I have a great metabolism, if I just stop eating for all the escapism stuff. that's really what it is, right? escaping from whatever we think we can't tolerate. feelings, I guess. or reality. both.

hey - it's getting late, look!

 

[Jo777]

Yep, ashen. Not that the 2.5 packs of cigs, lack of movement, air.. meds.. are helping. But, yep- grey. Last time I saw someone look like that, they weren't around much longer. My sisters live on the east coast- CT and NJ. They visit about 1x a year.. Soooo, by default, (and trust me- if I could run far far away, I would) it's on me and Todd. I have a love/hate relationship with mom, and recently have been seeing my dad in a different and unsettling (but understandable) light.

I have a little shame, it comes and goes. I do hate more often than love the way I look and feel right now.. occasionally I catch sight of myself naked and realize I look pretty ok and curvy, but more often, I just see that the hipbones are buried, and the pants are tight (but I do LOVE my tits like this, they are back!! ) Those and my face are the only things I like with more padding. I have to keep reminding myself, oh yeah- you dip.. you are like, oh, nearly every other woman in this place.. needing to lose a good 15lbs. Fuck, it's not 100+, but it still spooks the shit out of me.

 

[Charris]

Im sorry you are having so much piled on you at one time. I know I have times that due to stress my eating is horrible. I either wont eat at all or will non stop eat.

 

[Jo777]

Im sorry you are having so much piled on you at one time. I know I have times that due to stress my eating is horrible. I either wont eat at all or will non stop eat.

My husband is one of those naturally thin, self-regulating types. He stresses- he doesn't eat. I can't compute. I'm not complaining, but I wish I had his instincts/genes.

 

[Charris]

Wow Jo dont those types just make you be like Uggh. Especially when I can look at food and gain weight