College admissions pressure cooker

Bariatric & Weight Loss Surgery Forum

Help Support Bariatric & Weight Loss Surgery Forum:

hilary1617

First time at the rodeo.
Joined
Jan 6, 2014
Messages
3,867
I'm super frustrated and just want to vent here.

The pressure today's kids are under is insane. My daughter is a high school junior. Despite a year of school by Zoom, a mass shooting incident this summer in our town, the passing of her grandfather, etc. she has achieved straight A's in all of her classes, with a heavy load of honors and AP courses. She's also earned certificates online with Harvard and University of British Columbia curriculum classes from edx.org, and has attended a Saturday Morning Physics program at Fermilab. She's co-president of the philosophy club.

We just came back from meeting her post-secondary advisor, who advised that if she wants to get in to a highly selective school she:
  1. Cannot take a Ceramics class her senior year, that her heart was set on taking. She instead needs to take Astronomy or Sociology. Apparently enrolling next year in AP physics, multivariate calculus (she's taking Calc BC now), AP English literature, AP Statistics and AP Economics doesn't make a rigorous enough courseload to demonstrate competitive intellectual vitality.
  2. Her ONLY chance for an admission offer is to apply early decision to one school, promising to pay whatever they charge us and committing to attend that school if accepted.
I told her to take the darn ceramics class she wants and write her admissions essay about the importance of arts in promoting happiness.

Unreal!
 
Last edited:
I think you gave her excellent advice. Admissions people don't look only at grades (though of course grades and test scores are important), they also look for kids who are well rounded. They want a diverse group, and that means diverse backgrounds and interests and strengths, not just ethnicity. I hope she has a great time in that ceramics class!
 
I'm super frustrated and just want to vent here.

The pressure today's kids are under is insane. My daughter is a high school junior. Despite a year of school by Zoom, a mass shooting incident this summer in our town, the passing of her grandfather, etc. she has achieved straight A's in all of her classes, with a heavy load of honors and AP courses. She's also earned certificates online with Harvard and University of British Columbia curriculum classes from edx.org, and has attended a Saturday Morning Physics program at Fermilab. She's co-president of the philosophy club.

We just came back from meeting her post-secondary advisor, who advised that if she wants to get in to a highly selective school she:
  1. Cannot take a Ceramics class her senior year, that her heart was set on taking. She instead needs to take Astronomy or Sociology. Apparently enrolling next year in AP physics, multivariate calculus (she's taking Calc BC now), AP English literature, AP Statistics and AP Economics doesn't make a rigorous enough courseload to demonstrate competitive intellectual vitality.
  2. Her ONLY chance for an admission offer is to apply early decision to one school, promising to pay whatever they charge us and committing to attend that school if accepted.
I told her to take the darn ceramics class she wants and write her admissions essay about the importance of arts in promoting happiness.

Unreal!
Great advice, Mom! That advisor sounds very extreme and maybe even toxic to his young clients.
Susan
 
I have been reading about the insanity of it all. And wondering why those “highly selective schools” don’t ALSO publish the drop-out rate of first and second year students…or at least how many open spots they have for those who want to transfer in as Sophomores or JunIors. Because not all the “admits” last four years, or three or even two.

BTW, when MrSue and I went to community college as married adults with a kid, the counselor told us NOT to plan on a career in education because the field was overcrowded. MrSue asked, “How long have you been giving that advice and how many people per week hear that from you and the other counselors?”

MrSue felt that with all the people NOT going into education, by the time someone graduates with credentials, there might be an opening or two. He was right.

Oh…and this:
I was admitted to one of the EXTREMELY SELECTIVE Claremont Colleges, as a Junior. So somebody must have dropped out. Not getting into your first choice as a freshman does not mean you won’t graduate from that college.
 
I was admitted to one of the EXTREMELY SELECTIVE Claremont Colleges, as a Junior. So somebody must have dropped out. Not getting into your first choice as a freshman does not mean you won’t graduate from that college.
Coincidentally I've been trying to convince Hannah to take a look at the Claremont Colleges, because she's completely undecided on major and she has a preference for small colleges. The consortium offers the near ideal combination of the flexibility of many different major options, with the small classes and compact campus she desires (plus lots of sunshine!). After the shooting, and with her brother's and my mom's health concerns, she's hesitant to go beyond a small radius from our home. I want to see her spread her wings, but maybe she will do so later via transfer, semester abroad or grad school or maybe she won't and Chicago is just her kind of town. I know it will all work out. I'm just trying to make sure she is aware of and considers options available to her.

What upset me about the meeting with the counselor is that she left feeling more anxious and like her future wasn't going to be great, when she really has a lot of options directly as a result of years of significant effort she has put forth because she actually loves learning. She deserves to have an arts education too. She is not less than, but that is how he made her feel.

Great advice. What she needs to do is look at what the college of her choice is looking for, not the danged counselor.
Alas, the odds of admission aren't great because the demand is so high. That said, I highly doubt those odds will change much with or without a more "rigorous" course replacing ceramics next year. On the other hand, maybe she can share a portfolio of her artwork and they'll get a sense of her creativity and expression, which I think could work in her favor. If not, she can attend a less selective institution and still get a great education.

Real life is all about finding balance. I agree with you.
:) Thank you!
 
Last edited:
I don’t blame ANYONE for being a Chicago Girl. Our 25th anniversary was at YOUR Fremont Hotel. Years ago, a gang of bariatric surgery ladies and I met in Chicago and “dined” at a cool Tapas place. I’m such a geek, I liked visiting Sue the Dinosaur at the Field. And I ALWAYS conned MrSue into taking me there by talking about the Chicago River Ducks, but it was always off season. (He and MiniSue finally found an OPEN Ducks tour at the Wisconsin Dells!)

I cracked up the crowd with a POTENTIALLY off color comment on a Chicago Historical Society tour. It included one or more works by Chicago artist Mario Castillo, who used “semen-acrylic paint,” so that his presence would remain in his work.

Everyone was trying to look unbothered by the image. Guide asked if there were any questions and guess who raised her hand! I merely asked it his paintings could also be classified as “Performance Art.”
 
2807

We love Chicago, but California definitely has the weather advantage right now. Here's an image Charles snapped on a recent morning beach walk.
 
MiniSue and I once had a similar view from a hotel. The cute little “lake waves” were frozen. Not suitable for surfing!
 
I have no advice. I only wish her the best. I flunked out as a "traditional" student. My main objective was to get away from my overbearing father. I went back at age 27. I quadrupled my GPA. Those were the best years of school. Also, the difference between Ohio State and a small private college was worth every penny.

Your daughter has worked hard. She deserves a wide curriculum so her brain and heart can take advantage of both essential classes and those that give her pleasure, such as ceramics. Arts aren't fluff classes.
 
Tell her to take the ceramics class. Students are under so much pressure these days, and combine that with all the stresses involved in just trying to figure out who you are as a person while going through all the weird physical changes, and pile on achievement stress and other mental/emotional challenges - it's no wonder that depression in teenagers is up. The number of suicides in first year college students is rising at an alarming rate. Some of these students may have be afraid that not doing all the right things or potentially letting their parents and themselves down is unbearable. I don't know. I just know that I wish I could have done something so that my youngest son would not have become one of those statistics.

So, take the ceramics class. And tell her it's okay to choose something that brings her joy, that doesn't merely serve to meet some unknown and ever-changing list of requirements. Hell, take a gap year or go to community college. Those adjuncts who teach there are the same adjuncts who teach those same general requirements at the universities.

High school admissions counselors are under pressure from their bosses to meet metrics, and sadly, sometimes it's more about meeting those metrics and less about what will really help the students.

Okay, now I'm rambling. I need more coffee.
 

Latest posts

Back
Top