The Siren song of the scale...

[jillc]

I don't know how many times I've read "STAY OFF THE SCALE". Pre-surgery, I would shake my head at all the panicked people scared that they broke their DS because they hadn't lost weight.

I thought I would have no problem staying off the scale. But it whispers the lure of possible weight loss in my ear and I get on it.

I do pretty well sometimes and stay away from it. I can't wait until doctor's appointments because my surgeon is in NJ.

Karma is a bitch though, and I got on the scale this morning and was up 3 lbs. I have eaten more in the past two days than usual - but it was high protein, high fat and low carb. Logically, I know it could be my body adjusting to the new amount of food. Or other factors. I've been lifting more and it could be inflammation too.

I know it's a process. I'm not panicking (although my hindbrain is trying to make me think that I'm a failure - classic conditioning).

So, my question is - how often should you get on the scale. Once a month?

 

[JackieOnLine]

at your stage if you held it down to once a week that would be good.

I hear you - it wasn't this hard when I was losing steady in the first 1.5 years. lately I have lived without one but since gaining...now I want one again.

Anne Lamott did a thing on why she spent years buying a scale and then, a couple weeks later donating to goodwill but I wouldn't find it. I did find this by her

So I am at least five pounds up--but praise be to God, I do not currently have a scale, because as I've said before, getting on a scale is like asking Dick Cheney to give you a sense of your own self-worth.

I can still get my jeans on, for one reason: I wear forgiving pants. The world is too hard as it is, without letting your pants have an opinion on how you are doing. I struggle with enough self-esteem issues without letting my jeans get in on the act.

 

[jillc]

Thanks @JackieOnLine - I think the main problem is that I *know* it's a process, but your emotions can rule your head. I'm only 5.5 weeks out and I again *know* that my DS isn't broken. But...

It's weird. With my VBG I had to chew so much to make sure I didn't have an obstruction that I can consume more than some other post-ops because I break down my food so much. That's my theory, anyway.

So super paranoid about everything and trying to be logical. Logic wins, with a some anxiety thrown in (the hindbrain going "yeah but, what if you are the exception to the rule" "what if you are the one person this doesn't work for") and all those helpful things.

 

[robs477]

Thanks @JackieOnLine - "what if you are the one person this doesn't work for") and all those helpful things.

Sweetheart, I'm still a pre-op, so, I shouldn't be giving advice, but, It has to work, it has NO choice, its pure science! Aprox 90% of your small intestines have been bypassed. Just relax. You know these sweet ladies are going to tear in to you though don't you ..lol....and tell you to get off the GD scale!......I couldn't help it either though if I EVER get to that place!

 

[jillc]

@robs477 Yep I know. Like I said as a pre-op I swore I wouldn't be one of those people - immediately after surgery I really didn't care about the scale. It's been recently. I think I have too much time to think about things so I'd better get my arse in gear and think about other things.
And I know everything you said is true. I have put the scale away and am going to try to leave it alone for 2 weeks. I think that's a reasonable amount of time.

Thanks though!

 

[newanatomy]

I do get freaky when I'm not losing, just a little. It passes so quickly that I am able to weigh as often as I like. I weigh before bed and in the morning before I get dressed. I knew before surgery that I am one that needs to weigh often. Years ago, when I first started gaining weight, I truly believed that my clothes had shrunk, all of them!?! I am the queen of denial. I need to watch what I am doing. I log every bite and every sip in MFP too. I need to stay accountable. I think it is what will help me to maintain when I reach that stage.

I fluctuate about 2 1/2 pounds between a.m./p.m. I also pick up and lose about 2 pounds during the week depending on when I last had a big BM. The fluctuations don't bother me. I record my weight in a spreadsheet only once per week. I am almost 1 year post-op, I enjoy looking back on my weight loss and seeing my monthly pictures. It has been a fascinating process.

You will find what works for you. It will be whatever you are comfortable with and whatever gets you closer to your goals.

 

[brooklyngirl]

OMG, I'm like NA, I can't tell you how many times in my life I've thought to myself "how on earth did alllll my clothes shrink?!?" Ugh. Now, I go through spurts. After the first initial huge loss in the first month or so, I stay the same for a couple weeks sometimes, sometimes I go up a pound or 3 (or more) and then I drop like a brick when I get my period (8 pound difference this week!) some bodies just do that. I have no explanation for it, just letting you know you're not alone!

 

[southernlady]

I am one of those telling people to stay off the scale...those who can't deal with the bitch!

I spent over a decade with no scale even in the house so getting a scale was a HUGE effort. But I did. And for the first 3 months, I weighed every single morning, butt nekkid and after a potty trip. BUT I ONLY recorded it once a week. The ones that really counted were the ones that I did on a monthly basis. My surgery was on the 24th of Jan, so on the 24th of Feb, I recorded it but I also recorded my measurements. I did that every month for the first 2 years. NOW< i weigh once a week, on Sunday morning unless I am seeing the doctor. I weigh then nekkid and then dressed so I KNOW how much my clothes weigh and can check the accuracy of my home scale versus the doctor's scale.

I also DID NOT post on any forum (or FB) about my slow downs, stalls, etc. My husband knew but he was the only one.

Over on the Lightweights board on OH, someone started a Sunday Weigh in thread just after I joined...didn't start posting on it tho til I had surgery....when she stopped, I picked it up. And then also brought it over here. It does help with maintenance. Keeps us on track...even if we don't use a weight but other methods like clothing sizes, etc.

So KNOWING the scale is a bitch...and being able to tell yourself to shut up and not let it screw with you is the hard part. Many don't understand that.

 

[chevtow]

I don't own a scale so this is easy for me. I stop at my PCP office every two weeks and get weighed. I had my "stall" at about 5-6 weeks and thanks to everyone here I didn't panic.

 

[jillc]

Thanks @newanatomy & @brooklyngirl - I feel calmer now. I was of two minds whether to post this or not because I knew that it's a classic reaction.

Let me make it clear - I'm not panicking, not complaining. I knew getting on the scale was wrong. I was just discussing the fears that lie beneath the logic that I know. The logic wins. But the fear is unavoidable. I've had one failed WLS. That increases the stakes exponentially.

Until I started researching it this year, I didn't even realize it wasn't my fault that my VBG failed. But for 25+ years I thought I was a failure. So I shouldn't be surprised that I have some fears. I am, though.

But I'll deal with them. Thankfully, like I said before, logic will win the day with me.

 

[southernlady]

Let me make it clear - I'm not panicking, not complaining. I knew getting on the scale was wrong. I was just discussing the fears that lie beneath the logic that I know. The logic wins. But the fear is unavoidable. I've had one failed WLS. That increases the stakes exponentially.

Until I started researching it this year, I didn't even realize it wasn't my fault that my VBG failed. But for 25+ years I thought I was a failure. So I shouldn't be surprised that I have some fears. I am, though.

But I'll deal with them. Thankfully, like I said before, logic will win the day with me.

I know you aren't panicking over it...Okay, maybe the first thought is panic but logic does win the day. And I knew you weren't saying, "I broke my DS, why isn't the scale moving".

My dh has a standard thought when I tell him about some of the twits I see over on FB wondering WHY they aren't losing...he tells me to tell them:
"Yes, you broke your DS (or WLS), You are too stupid to own one. Please pack it up and send it back".
And he KNOWS I will not say that.
But what I do tell those people is to STAY off the scale...once I told someone for the 5th time to "stay off the fucking scale", she blocked me. Apparently didn't like my language.

Very few of us break our DS...but it IS harder as a revision...cause your previous one DID break thru no fault of your own. And there is always the fear that this one will break too. That you will be the ONE person this doesn't work for. We've failed at diets because our metabolism is wonky and that is a mind fuck too.

Weighing is not the issue but letting it mess with your mind is an issue. Some people can't handle the scale...they let a piece of inanimate equipment rule their emotions for the day.

 

[star0210]

Thanks @newanatomy & @brooklyngirl - I feel calmer now. I was of two minds whether to post this or not because I knew that it's a classic reaction.

Let me make it clear - I'm not panicking, not complaining. I knew getting on the scale was wrong. I was just discussing the fears that lie beneath the logic that I know. The logic wins. But the fear is unavoidable. I've had one failed WLS. That increases the stakes exponentially.

Until I started researching it this year, I didn't even realize it wasn't my fault that my VBG failed. But for 25+ years I thought I was a failure. So I shouldn't be surprised that I have some fears. I am, though.

But I'll deal with them. Thankfully, like I said before, logic will win the day with me.

I don't think its WRONG to get on the scale as long as you don't let it sabotage you or eff with your mind too much. Friday's are my official weigh in day but I'll hop on other days as well...out of sheer curiosity to see how my weight fluctuates day to day.

I totally understand the fear, especially being a revision...and last week I did say the words to my hubby in a very annoying whiny voice...waahhh, I'm going to be the one person the DS doesn't work for. It was a moment of fear and frustration as I got on the scale for my weekly weigh in and it hadn't moved for the third week in a row. It was very short lived. I'm more of a logical practical person than I am an emotional person.

I've lost inches and my clothes are getting looser..but I haven't yet allowed myself to try on any of my pants that had gotten too small. Lol

My philosophy is just to stay the course no matter what. It is what it is and will be what it will be.

 

[JackieOnLine]

I don't think its WRONG to get on the scale as long as you don't let it sabotage you or eff with your mind too much.

this is one of those things where you find out what works for YOU. and realize it may change. I was doing well without a scale...but now I am thinking about getting one.

 

[jillc]

Exactly @southernlady. I really don't blame your husband for telling you to do that because you do see it all the time on FB (among other bone-headed things).

Their actions remind me of this old joke about a person who calls a computer help desk because their computer isn't working:

Word Perfect Technical support; may I help you?"

"Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."

"What sort of trouble?"

"Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."

"Went away?"

"They disappeared."

"Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"

"Nothing."

"Nothing?"

"It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."

"Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"

"How do I tell?"

"Can you see the C:\ prompt on the screen?"

"What's a sea-prompt?"

"Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?"

"There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."

"Does your monitor have a power indicator?"

"What's a monitor?"

"It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?"

"I don't know."

"Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?"

....."Yes, I think so."

"Great! Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall."

....."Yes, it is."

"When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"

"No."

"Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."

....."Okay, here it is."

"Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."

"I can't reach it."

"Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"

"No."

"Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"

"Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle-it's because it's dark."

"Dark?"

"Yes-the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."

"Well, turn on the office light then."

"I can't."

"No? Why not?"

"Because there's a power outage."

"A power... A power outage? Aha! Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?"

"Well, yes. I keep them in the closet."

"Good! Go get them and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."

"Really! Is it that bad?"

"Yes, I'm afraid it is."

"Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"

"Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer."

I really respect that you don't tell them what your DH suggested though and I thank you for not telling me the same

Edited because some of the joke was outside of the quote tags

 

[southernlady]

Yeap, that is exactly what he is basing it on...that old computer joke. Which actually isn't so much of a joke unfortunately. There are a few people out there not capable of owning a computer. but as Diana is fond of reminding us, half the population falls on the bottom half of the intellectual curve.