Yup, I understand. If you knew me you would have realized I meant that "in my head". What wistfulness you picked up was that I wish I was more extraverted, not that I really was going to approach that girl. "Language is a virus from outer space." and all that.
No worries.
It's always interesting to see how differently people perceive our written words when they can't hear the context we had in our minds while writing.
To answer your question: I am a diehard extravert and an evangelist for whatever cause I'm most passionate about. People either love me or hate me for it. It's a personality trait/s. If you're an introvert, you should not try to be someone you are not.
It took DECADES of my life to connect with that identity, and shedding the fat was a significant contributor to getting there. So OF COURSE I am a DS evangelist
. The difference is that it only happens when conversation turns to health and weight.
It's part of how I tell my story, too, insofar as it's often pertinent, in my current line of work, to mention that I was severely disabled for many years and now I have my life back. That often leads to the opportunity to tell people
what nearly killed me and how I saved my life. But I always couch it in terms of illness and risk of death. I don't talk much about size other than to say I was more than twice as heavy as I am now. I talk about how I was dying of umpteen different things, and getting rid of the weight got rid of all but one of them (the sleep apnea).
Hell would freeze over before I broached the topic to any MO person who did not first ask about it. I got abused by everyone and their dog about my weight from the time I was a preschooler up until a year or two before my DS. And make no mistake, being approached by a stranger in any way, shape or form about weight loss counts in my book as a form of hate speech or abuse.
One of my nieces is SMO. She's adopted and my sis and BIL are acquainted with the birth mom (open adoption). Nothing is known about the sperm donor. Birth mom came from a family of women of Amazonian stature and was no shrimp herself, I'm told. Niece is around six feet tall, strong as an ox, very muscular, and to my eye carries the excess fat mainly externally. She's freaking GORGEOUS, too.
BIL's family is just about 100% Irish, and the women, to a tee, grew up willowy, had perfect skin, curly hair, and were either of the dark hair/eyes against milky skin or the blonde-and-green typology.(They've all gained considerable weight in adulthood.) Niece is olive skinned, dark hair, dark eyes. She shot up like a fast growing tree among the willows. It was very, very tough on her. There was quiet bias/discomfiture about her being an adopted only in a typically Irish Catholic clan of oodles of kids.
.....And then she started gaining weight. AND she was a picky eater, somewhere along the sensory processing problem spectrum.
On our side of the clan were the real fatist assholes. The worst was the brother whom I visited last summer who appears to be falling into dementia and his whackjob wife. According to them, my niece's life is worth nothing because she's so fat.
Niece was a SMO teenager when she and sis visited me here in NJ for a week or two as I was recovering from my hysterectomy, two years before my DS. I was on 19 prescriptions, on oxygen, partially wheelchair-bound. Niece waited, I am sure, for the lectures to start coming about , "look what fate awaits you if you don't fix yourself." Sis and BIL didn't do that, thank heavens.
Niece saw my life saved and transformed by the DS. She knows she can ask me anything, any time. I am NEVER going to broach the subject. She's been abused enough.
