The Free Ride Does Come to an END!

[Munchkin]

Doesn't matter what surgery you have, the day will come when you realize the easy weightloss is over. And once again you are faced with the reality of diets, increased exercise, and less food. During the honeymoon, it's easy to fall into that false hope that you will just effortlessly maintain for the rest of your life. I guess it happens for a few but most of us end up back in diet mode sooner or later.

This is why I'm always telling people not to waste those precious days of easy weightloss. And if you are lucky enough to reach goal, try for 10% below goal so you have some room for that seemingly inevitable gain. Yes, you may be less than a year post and the weight is still falling off. You are lucky today but your luck will run out! Lose as much as you can while you can. It will be much harder to lose down the road.

Why does this happen? If you had a malabsorbtive procedure, your body will do it's best to adapt and return to normal. And normal means fat for us. The small bowel that's not bypassed may lengthen and sprout some new villi to absorb as much as possible. That teeny tiny stomach you used to have gets bigger too. You can eat more. This is why we stop losing and many eventually gain.

If you had a procedure that is restrictive only like the band or the sleeve, you may learn how to eat around the band. And once that stomach gets bigger, the sleeve doesn't help you nearly as much as it used to. You can easily find yourself back in that eat less and less mode while still gaining weight.

Of course, it's not fair and it's not right. But it's real life. Even though you took extreme measures to lose weight, you are still going to have to fight to maintain that loss. Darn it! Resolve not to sabotage yourself in the beginning by believing you have beaten your weight problem into submission forever. But it's not the hopeless problem it was before surgery, we can manage it but it's work. Hard work.

I've been on one forum or another for more than a decade. I can't tell you how many times I've heard people worried about losing too much and how to stop the loss. Some even go to their surgeons and ask about revision or pharmacological intervention to stop losing. Some intentionally eat all the wrong things because they have lost too much too fast. There's about a 97% chance these same people will be back on the board in a year or so struggling to reach goal and lose more weight. It happens over and over.

Lose as much as you can while you can! Don't even think about about losing too much unless your BMI gets too low. Like under 20. That rarely happens. I can only remember 2 people out of all the thousands I've followed who actually needed help to stop losing!

 

[Bagaof4]

Thank you so much for this post and Liz, for your continued encouragement. At 15 months out, I am now sitting at 118 (BMI of 20), 23% below the high range of normal (145) and 14% below my personal goal of 135. I don't like posting this because I feel like I should be grateful to have reached my goal and beyond, but your post reminds me that others may be dealing with the fear of losing too much. Your comments help me keep my perspective of the 'marathon' of this journey and not panic. I feel good, my labs are good and those indicators are more important to me than people's comments of being too skinny. I accept the fact that there will be rebound, continue to eat right (100+ gr of protein, 100+ gr fat and 100- gr carbs every day) drink lots of water and just see where this goes.
Again, thank you for the reminder!

 

[Whit]

Thanks for the post. I am going through this too. For me part of the fear is because I have never been this small EVER! After my RNY to got down to a 12 I was satisfied with my loss but the honymoon ended and after 5 years on came the weight. Durring my revision research a Dr who claims he is a WLS revision surgeon told me revision to DS would result in dippers and me being 85 pounds (jerk). A year post revision I am now a normal size and not to thin in comparison to "Normies". But compared to the old me, wow, it does trill and terify me a second later. Am I going to be the one who loses to much? My husband is worried and I just tell him there will be a bounce back. I do not know when but it will happen. That my Dr. is keeping an eye on my health and I could lose 15-20 more pounds before I would be considered under weight.

 

[cajungirl]

Excellent post! Couldn't agree more, I tell people this ALL the time. Newbies get scared understandably so.

I was one that got below goal and received all the comments of concern. I didn't worry I never saw myself as too small. It serves us well to get some cushion, if it happens, as we all too often see those come back a year or two later asking for help with regain.

 

[andrea in the UK]

wish this had been posted after i had my surgery! 5 years on and I am typically struggling with weight gain. Just cannot get my head in the right place. On the lead up to my surgery here in the UK I never had the help where I do feel is needed most, and that is physcological. As has been said many many times, they operate on your body and give you the tools to work it yourself but no instruction manual on how to cope with your mind!

 

[kirmy]

Yeh I hear you. I get antsy when I read of newbies chugging back sodas and breads etc knowing that this is the time to change and that that shit is gateway drugs into long term non compliance. Shit look at me! If I hadn't have had sonic malabsorption I'd be no where near goal. The good thing is I did stay away from bread,white flour and soda but not chocolate.

I am still a size 8 USA or 10 UK but I want to be lighter. This is compounded by my terror of failing at this so I intellectually know I should cut myself a fucking break. I'm in the healthy weight range but any gain is a sign I've broken this shit. Honestly....I know I'm an idiot about this.

I've been eating ice cream, chocolate, nachos etc over the entire festive period like a drowning man. I want to reel this shit right in so I'm good with myself in my head. The free ride is just never there.... So starting to force positive behaviour straight off the bat is the only and best option for us.

Amen.

 

[JackieOnLine]

I had a very long honeymoon period - seriously, like over 3 years. but when it's over, you are back to being a person who needs to pay attention to what and how and when and how much you eat. just like a non-op....but with a secret weapon.

 

[newanatomy]

Thanks so much for the great advice. I am going to mark this to re-read when I start to feel immortal.

 

[ProteinSnob]

I had a long "honeymoon period" after RNY where I stayed around 150/160 because I was a runner and ate a lot of meat salads. But the regain train started, along with RH and worsening dumping syndrome. Looking back, I really think that diet soda could have been an issue- especially after I came across some news story a while back that linked RH and diet soda. I have no study to back that assertion up, though. In my opinion, it always helps to try to build and maintain muscle (which burns more calories). I also gave up my diet soda habit when I had revision surgery.

 

[Jo777]

Yep- back to being normal here.. well, normal for being post-op. If I eat meats, veggies and fat- I'm uber-restricted just like I was about 8mo-9mo out.. my stomach is about the same capacity wise for the slow-emptying stuff.. but the days of feeling full on craptastic foods is long gone, popcorn, breads, pasta process faster.. However, eating those same foods makes me FEEL pretty badly sometimes (physically) so for the most part, I avoid them. This holiday season I managed to not, and am feeling bloated and retaining a goodly amount of water along with a few extra lbs.. Knocked off on the sugar/wheat a few days ago and already have dropped a few lbs in water.. just need to keep on the real-food train and will get back to my normal in a few weeks. I know what I need to do to stay healthy, and honestly- I can only eat about a slice and a half of real pizza now.. so my perception of a larger stomach is kinda skewed.. I used to eat 4 at a time..

 

[Happy DSr]

the YMMV concept has to be considered here. I am six years out and maintain at my goal with a 10 oound bounceback. My weight has been stable over the past 4 years. Regardless of what I eat, (and I eat a LOT!) or what little exercise I do, my weight bounces up and down in the same 7-8 pound range. And when I eat a lot, it tends to the lower end - go figure.

I do know that my DS allows me tremendous flexibility and if needed, I can rely on it to do its magic if I cut out carbs and increase my protein. Yet I don't need to overwork its superpower to keep the weight off. It does it on its own. Perhaps I am lucky, but it works for me. I love my DS

 

[andrea in the UK]

OK, question here, When you get your "good healthy head" on and start to eat properly again, does the weight come off quicker or is it like the olden times when it would shift at about a lb a week if you were really really good?

 

[Jo777]

OK, question here, When you get your "good healthy head" on and start to eat properly again, does the weight come off quicker or is it like the olden times when it would shift at about a lb a week if you were really really good?

For me, I've been working on "it's the process, not the end result" mindset.. so 1lb a week is fine by me.. but damn, that's nothing more that flat realism speaking at this point in my life.. plus for me, honestly I FEEL so much better gut-wise when I don't eat stupid too many days running (once a week is fine, weeks running, no so much._

I'd imagine most us in "maint" for better word? are at goal, a little under.. or within 10-20 lbs over.. We're fucking NORMAL. If you are just starting, enjoy the rush, getting it off fast is pretty heady stuff. Otherwise at least for me it's what I always imagined other people who are normal sized deal with, and I think it's not too far off.

When I was nearly 300lbs, yeah, losing a lb a week would be considered slow.. but when you are packing maybe 15lbs extra, and you just have a little padding.. a pound a week is just fine. The last mindset I'm trying to conquer is the all-or-nothing, panic drop mode.. I drift.. my pants get tight, I stop being so fucking hedonistic. Healthy vs skinny.. I'm striving for the middle somewhere closer to healthy.

 

[Munchkin]

For me, I've been working on "it's the process, not the end result" mindset.. so 1lb a week is fine by me.. but damn, that's nothing more that flat realism speaking at this point in my life.. plus for me, honestly I FEEL so much better gut-wise when I don't eat stupid too many days running (once a week is fine, weeks running, no so much._

I'd imagine most us in "maint" for better word? are at goal, a little under.. or within 10-20 lbs over.. We're fucking NORMAL. If you are just starting, enjoy the rush, getting it off fast is pretty heady stuff. Otherwise at least for me it's what I always imagined other people who are normal sized deal with, and I think it's not too far off.

When I was nearly 300lbs, yeah, losing a lb a week would be considered slow.. but when you are packing maybe 15lbs extra, and you just have a little padding.. a pound a week is just fine. The last mindset I'm trying to conquer is the all-or-nothing, panic drop mode.. I drift.. my pants get tight, I stop being so fucking hedonistic. Healthy vs skinny.. I'm striving for the middle somewhere closer to healthy.

This is so right on! It's all about percentages. Once you are in 'regular' sizes it's only 10 to 20 pounds per size. That one pound a week is killer for someone of relatively 'normal' weight. Now when I was really huge, I could lose 30 pounds and still be wearing the same clothes. That was one of the depressing hopeless things about being MO! At least to me this was a real downer!

 

[Munchkin]

Thanks so much for the great advice. I am going to mark this to re-read when I start to feel immortal.

Are you in Salt Lake? I lived in Midvale and thought the area was probably one of the prettiest places I have ever lived. I had an older home on the East side and in my normal sized back yard I had grapes, currants, 2 kinds of cherries, apples, pears, peaches, nectarines, and probably some other edible stuff I didn't even know was there! I canned everything! We used to have salsa canning parties where we did the salsa by the garbage can full(new cans of course). They were the only containers we could find that were big enough!