So Frustrated, Please Read, Need Advice?

[Rob]

Hi everyone, my name is Rob. I’ve been reading all the posts on this site for several months and the knowledge and kindness you people have is incredible!!, so, I signed up and really need some HELP!!!
I am SO flippin frustrated!! I apologize for the following long email, but you guys need to know my situation so you can give me your esteemed advice. After yesterday’s FOURTH visit, to FOUR different alleged DS Doctors in Houston (that advertise doing the DS) that I’ve been to and their pitch to me has all been the same: ”I don’t think you need the DS and would benefit more from the VSG”….and then when I say I am interested in DS only because I am a SUPER absorber , their pre-planned well-rehearsed and thought out scripted back-up response is…..”If we do decide to do the DS, I like to do it in two different stages….first we do the VSG part, you lose 40-50 lbs and then we come back 5-6 months later and do the 2nd stage”…….I swear to god, I am so upset!!!!!!!!! I have read from ALL you guys on FOUR forum sites I’ve been reading from about this “Bait and switch” and I am NOT going to accept that. For me it’s DS or nothing. Here is my short story and WHY I am saying that. I am 56, 5’11” and weigh 360. My highest weight was 390 and that’s what I go to when I eat ONLT 1500-2000 calories a day. For the last TEN yrs or so, I have to limit myself to about 500-800 calories a day…IF I go over that I GAIN WEIGHT!!! AND NO Dr. F***ing believes me! That is why the VSG alone will not work for me; I would still super absorb everything. And, even IF I did agree, by the time “stage 2” rolls around, at 50 lbs. less and I would NO LONGER QUALIFY FOR INSURANCE as you ALL know, AND THEY KNOW THAT TOO, They are all just GODAMN SCAMMERS!!!!!!!!!!! So???? WT Hell do I do????? I am running out of options and Surgeons to go to??? How do I assure DS or nothing??? Will they sign an agreement? When I tell them one stage or nothing, They also all say “ I won’t know until I get in there if I can do it or not, might not have enough room, fatty liver etc” Cant I just say….OK…. then if you need more room, just OPEN ME UP! I would rather have open surgery than wake up to find out I only got the VSG!!! I have been living like this for 40 years and don’t want another failed pipe dream hoping another diet or something else will work. I Know my body and from experience that the DS is my only hope and I just can’t seem to flipping get to first base, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE help me, I feel I’m running out of time and options, not to mention all the time off work, forms to fill out and monies spent going to all these Drs. THANK YOU ON ADVANCE for your time! Rob

 

[DianaCox]

Need more info. Which surgeons have you seen? Provide details of your insurance. You would still be over a 40 BMI at 310, so not sure what you mean - the BMI >50 requirement can be overcome. But yes, a one-step DS is highly preferable. Do you have a serious comorbidity that puts you at excessive surgical risk?

 

[Spiky Bugger]

Hi everyone, my name is Rob. I’ve been reading all the posts on this site for several months and the knowledge and kindness you people have is incredible!!, so, I signed up and really need some HELP!!!
I am SO flippin frustrated!! I apologize for the following long email, but you guys need to know my situation so you can give me your esteemed advice. After yesterday’s FOURTH visit, to FOUR different alleged DS Doctors in Houston (that advertise doing the DS) that I’ve been to and their pitch to me has all been the same: ”I don’t think you need the DS and would benefit more from the VSG”….and then when I say I am interested in DS only because I am a SUPER absorber , their pre-planned well-rehearsed and thought out scripted back-up response is…..”If we do decide to do the DS, I like to do it in two different stages….first we do the VSG part, you lose 40-50 lbs and then we come back 5-6 months later and do the 2nd stage”…….I swear to god, I am so upset!!!!!!!!! I have read from ALL you guys on FOUR forum sites I’ve been reading from about this “Bait and switch” and I am NOT going to accept that. For me it’s DS or nothing. Here is my short story and WHY I am saying that. I am 56, 5’11” and weigh 360. My highest weight was 390 and that’s what I go to when I eat ONLT 1500-2000 calories a day. For the last TEN yrs or so, I have to limit myself to about 500-800 calories a day…IF I go over that I GAIN WEIGHT!!! AND NO Dr. F***ing believes me! That is why the VSG alone will not work for me; I would still super absorb everything. And, even IF I did agree, by the time “stage 2” rolls around, at 50 lbs. less and I would NO LONGER QUALIFY FOR INSURANCE as you ALL know, AND THEY KNOW THAT TOO, They are all just GODAMN SCAMMERS!!!!!!!!!!! So???? WT Hell do I do????? I am running out of options and Surgeons to go to??? How do I assure DS or nothing??? Will they sign an agreement? When I tell them one stage or nothing, They also all say “ I won’t know until I get in there if I can do it or not, might not have enough room, fatty liver etc” Cant I just say….OK…. then if you need more room, just OPEN ME UP! I would rather have open surgery than wake up to find out I only got the VSG!!! I have been living like this for 40 years and don’t want another failed pipe dream hoping another diet or something else will work. I Know my body and from experience that the DS is my only hope and I just can’t seem to flipping get to first base, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE help me, I feel I’m running out of time and options, not to mention all the time off work, forms to fill out and monies spent going to all these Drs. THANK YOU ON ADVANCE for your time! Rob

@Rob ,

Welcome. And I'm sorry. And, last I heard, the list of vetted DS surgeons who really do the DS is being updated. As far as I recall, though, the Houston area never had four DS surgeons...so you have found some doctors to avoid...not because they don't do the DS, but because they are dishonest in general.

Diana is your man...Larra is your other man...on getting this stuff done. They will need personal info and I'm pretty sure they won't mind if you do that via PM. But are you in a PPO that lets you go anywhere? Or are you stuck in an HMO?

Diana knows FAR MORE about insurance than I do, but could it be that your insurance has a "just one" clause for bariatric surgery? If it does, it wouldn't matter if you lost or gained after the sleeve, unless someone is a Coding Magician and gets it all pre-approved, that second surgery would be at your expense.

Welcome. Thanks for delurking. The cavalry is on the way!

Sue

 

[Rob]

Hi Diana, I must say, you are one of my most esteemed posters, so thxs for the reply (to all). No real surgery risks, do have moderate high blood pressure, sleep apnea and borderline type II diabetes. Am pretty healthy actually mostly because I dont eat much. I've already sort of been living as a DS'r for a while because in order to get some proteins and vitamins in, I already do shakes and supplements. I was reluctant to name Dr,'s just out of respect.....but, here goes anyway, seen Dr. Bonnor, Ferrari, Yu and talked with Dr. Todd Wilson after their seminar. Actual appointment with him is in a week. My Insurance is OK, NP with any of that, they allow the BMI to go down to 40 for any covered WLS including the DS and no limits on where I can go.

 

[Larra]

Rob, if your insurance will work for this, try Dr. Ayoola (hope I spelled that right) in Denton, TX. He worked with Dr. Stewart, sadly now deceased, who was a staunch supporter of the DS, and Dr. Ayoola also has a good reputation. I don't think you'll get the "bait and don't switch" routine from him.
I realize TX is a large state and that Denton may be a fair distance from you, but the effort will be worth it.

And I agree with your analysis that the DS is far and away your best option. Not only because you have already proven that you don't lose weight, for whatever reason, short of starvation, and thus a purely restrictive operation will be useless for you, but also because the DS has the best rate of permanent resolution for all your comorbidities. And I can also picture the results if you have VSG, with still more scripted speeches - if you don't lose weight, it's your fault and we're not going to operate again. If you DO lose weight, you don't need the second operation! Either way, you're screwed.

 

[Spiky Bugger]

Rob, if your insurance will work for this, try Dr. Ayoola (hope I spelled that right) in Denton, TX. He worked with Dr. Stewart, sadly now deceased, who was a staunch supporter of the DS, and Dr. Ayoola also has a good reputation. I don't think you'll get the "bait and don't switch" routine from him.
I realize TX is a large state and that Denton may be a fair distance from you, but the effort will be worth it.

And I agree with your analysis that the DS is far and away your best option. Not only because you have already proven that you don't lose weight, for whatever reason, short of starvation, and thus a purely restrictive operation will be useless for you, but also because the DS has the best rate of permanent resolution for all your comorbidities. And I can also picture the results if you have VSG, with still more scripted speeches - if you don't lose weight, it's your fault and we're not going to operate again. If you DO lose weight, you don't need the second operation! Either way, you're screwed.

Correct spelling. And he has a pro-DS for diabetes video:

 

[JackieOnLine]

I won't be any help but I do wish you the best. it's hard to be patient, I know, but at least you know what you want and will have help to get there.

 

[ShiftedSanity]

Welcome ...i feel your pain....don't do a two stage if at all possible ..... keep looking ....
I went through a 12 hour fix on an eroded band and miss formed sleeve.
I can tell you a good Dr. In Seattle area that doesn't give up ..... Dr. M. Srikanth
If that isn't too far.....best to you...
Shifty out

 

[Munchkin]

Ayoola in Denton is just about your only choice in Texas. About a 6 hour drive for you. It's doable. Many traveled overseas for surgery!

 

[Elizabeth N.]

If you don't have limits on where to go, skip all the others and go to the known entity, Dr. Ayoola. Quit wasting time.

 

[DianaCox]

Of the four you listed, a big fat noooope to all of them. If you meant E Wilson, who is "sort" of a DS surgeon, you're still better off traveling to someone else.

 

[Rob]

Thxs for the replies. It looks more and more it looks like Dr. Ayoola in Dallas may be my only option. You would think in a big city like Houston which is known for having some of the best medical care in the world, there would be more options, but, am running out of options with all these posers. I will call Dr. Ayoola's office after the Holiday. Thxs for all you'lls advice and posts. Can't imagine doing this without all this knowleadge from you experts!

 

[Larra]

Rob, you are on the right track. I'm sure there are many fine doctors in Houston but the DS just isn't done by that many surgeons. The really sad part of your story, to me, is that some surgeons talk people out of the operation known to have the best results. I'm sorry you ran into this, and even sorrier for the people less well informed who fall for it. The group here is ver well informed, but we reach only a tiny fraction of the 200,000 or so people having bariatric surgery each year in the USA alone.
So stick to your guns, don't settle, and you'll get the surgery you need.

 

[Elizabeth N.]

Thxs for the replies. It looks more and more it looks like Dr. Ayoola in Dallas may be my only option. You would think in a big city like Houston which is known for having some of the best medical care in the world, there would be more options, but, am running out of options with all these posers. I will call Dr. Ayoola's office after the Holiday. Thxs for all you'lls advice and posts. Can't imagine doing this without all this knowleadge from you experts!

If only it were so simple, but it isn't. People travel all the time for surgery and you will do just fine. Many of us have done it and you will have tons of support here.

 

[newanatomy]

I had to go out of state for my surgery, only 3 hours away though. Must go where the best care is available.