Separate names with a comma.
Discussion in 'Sharing My Journey' started by DuodenalSwitchaRoo, Dec 26, 2014.
So, typically by this time of year I am a suicidal mess. It never fails. Here in England the sun rises after 8am and sets before 4pm at the worst of it. ugh.
This year, I decided to hold off on the antidepressants. Sertraline (zoloft) has worked for me in the past but within it's little side-effect leaflet lists osteoarthritis. Hello! Im 37 and just had a hip replacement. So I really REALLY wanted to avoid that if at all possible.
Things I have done differently this winter: 100,000k of D3 daily and my handy little sad light for 4-6 HOURS a day. Most people only need 15 minutes....not me. I need it for HOURS. That and I've worked really hard at keeping a strict sleep schedule..it has kinda gone to shit a bit over christmas but up to then it was in bed at 10 and up at 6. It was hard as all I want to do is sleep, but getting up, showering and starting my day with a protein coffee has kept me basically stable.
I'm bipolar, a slightly different kettle of fish as my depression can easily turn psychotic, but Im hopeful this year. Besides a few down days, I've been ok (read: not happy, but out of the danger zone of not living through the winter).
I hope your son gets help, some how, some way. Shrinks are insane. This is why I am studying psychology lol. I have read promising things about Ketamine. I'm just stubborn in general and dislike taking meds.
Sunlight really affects bipolar, as you know. You're doing all the right things. A few other thoughts...
1. Try to get out in the natural light. It helps.
2. If your SAD light is old, get new bulbs. Even though the light looks as bright, it is not sending the right wave lengths after a while. Use it in the morning, not evening.
3. Within 3 hours of bed, wear glasses with orange lens. This neutralizes the blue glow found in home lighting -- especially in TVs and computer screens. That blue hue tells your brain it's morning WAKE UP. But wrong, you want it to go to sleep. Blocking blue with the orange lets your brain know to get ready for bed. (These glasses are a special orange color... used by dentists to protect their eyes when they whiten your teeth or are setting filling compounds. They fit over regular glasses if you wear them.) I ordered these online for my son who also has bipolar and they helped a great deal. I even found I fell asleep faster if I wore them for an hour before bed.
Thanks and glad you are doing well.
Cameron has been a mess from February of 14 (didn't know until May when his girlfriend broke up with him and he drank a bottle of whiskey and took a bottle of Ibuprofen) to a few months ago. He seems to have stabilized and is getting his life back in order. He has some challenges as he has chronic back and abdominal pain. He was on a new drug called Nuycenta for a month and was doing well and then insurance denied it. It acts on neural receptors as well so it has some antidepressant effect as well. He just had a psyche eval so he can try a pain stimulator device and hopefully get off all narcotics...I hate those effing things. Hopefully he will get that soon. We have talked to several people, medical people who have said they have seen many people get these implants who had terrible chronic pain and they have come completely off meds.
Cameron is doing well with his severe Gerd (two nissen fundolication repairs and major diaphragm herina repairs) and his gastroparesis that Dr K fixed. Those issues along with his chronic pain had him thinking he would never have a normal life and now he sees that a normal life is not only possible but very probable. He has also come to terms with alcohol and substance issues. The kid had a rough 5 years from his diagnosis of cancer onward, but he is finally getting to the point where he is ready to fully integrate back into society. He is taking classes full time next semester on campus at local community college and looking for a job to support his bills (lives at home but has racked up debt and some legal fees).
BTW, he has had ketmaine with ECT treatments in the past and he says those made him feel better than anything (he would have really bad migraine headache for a day or two after ECT but then it would make him feel much better emotionally for a month or so. There is a place in Chicago that does combo Ketamine and TMS therapy but of course they don't accept inusance and you have to go two to four times a week for like 8 weeks. Cost would be nearly $20K so just don't see it...not to mention with his seizure history I don't think he can do TMS.
HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!! I will need you to send me some via fedex Even during the 5 or so hours of 'daylight' here, it is very dark with rainy clouds.
My light is newish. I had it for at least 2 years....this is the first year I've used it. I swear having the DS made me better at self care in general. I don't use it after 6pm as a rule. I have struggled with chronic insomnia before (56 hours awake, delirious and hypomanic! not good!)
It's a balancing act. I will look into the orange glasses as not heard of them before Thanks!
I hear you on the sunlight. I live in the north at a great lake that causes winter cloud cover.
There have been studies where they have brought people out of profound mania without medication by keeping them in total darkness for 12 hrs, then bright sunshine for 12. So, yeah, maintaining good sleep/wake cycle is critical.
Here's a link on the glasses (I think -- it's been 4-5 years since I purchased.) Funny when I got these glasses on the screen, the Amazon "frequently bought with" items were 2 SAD lamps so a lot of people buy them to help with sleep!
You look great! I love the cute outfit!
Roo, you look great!
Roo, you are freakin' amazing!
Thanks! 380 lost so far and trying not to be sad about that even though Im still pretty dang large. But Im a lot smaller than I used to be!
Every time you even think about being sad, consider where you would be today if you had done nothing! It takes so much courage to change and you did it. And 266 is not 'dang large'.
Im filled with the green eye monster right now. Most get an apronectomy by 200-250lbs lost when they start where I did. And yet Ive lost more and here I am. Waiting. Waiting. Will it ever happen for me? ugh.
Im stuck with weight loss and keep gaining and losing the same 10lbs. Mike is going to the US next week and Im going on a protein bar diet. I don't care how stupid it sounds. Im desperate and can't low carb like everyone else and I refuse to be a failure. And I feel like a bloody failure. :/
@DuodenalSwitchaRoo can't wait to see your newest progress pictures